Says here I have published 2,161 posts on this blog. About three a week since August 2011. All but eight have been reviews. Let’s post a ninth, shall we?
The tenfootpole is a place of crap. Full of shit and worthless writing about it. A monument to the hubris of man that stinks like a trash container full of dead squirrels sitting the June heat for a week.
What it is not is an outpost of the great internet hype machine. But the hype machine has made a foray, testing the borders of the volcano lair. You see, Greg Gawron, Founder, Advanced Fantasy Games, has responded to my review of The Lost Tomb of Kazcuk Mot the Undying. You can read the response for yourself, or simply rely on my cherry picking. Fear not gentle ones, while there is no bad publicity, I have no great conceit here. Nothing matters and the tilting of windmills must be done, as Camus says, in spite of the results.
Our goal was to hit the market with a fun and challenging adventure that sets a new standard for Old School formats, use of cool artwork reflective of the earlier days of D&D, and other traditional things like a removable cover, blue map, challenging encounters, 12 point font for easy reading in low light, and more. However, we didn’t just put extra effort into the module itself, we also made a commitment to our customers with a quickly delivered product immediately after the Kickstarter closed. Also through our timely communications, packaging, shipping, and little details needed to earn their business again and again.
We see here, the Advanced Fantasy Games creed. This line is a nostalgia play. It is an appeal to nostalgia, no doubt to those middle aged people who have a fond memory from their past about D&D. And now have money to spend. It’s a member-berry. And, note, as a major selling point, the commitment to a quickly delivered product, timely communication, packaging, shipping, and other little details needed to earn the repeat reader business. Great for your fucking revenue stream, eh? Lots and lots of shit mentioned there isn’t there? Oh, hey, wait. Do you think it’s weird that not much is mentioned about the ACTUAL ADVENTURES? I mean, i don’t. Why would he write a decent adventure anyway when the focus is clearly on the repeated buyer.
Let us look now at the comments about the adventure that Greg Gawron, Founder, Advanced Fantasy Games, specifically called out to us, as convincing testimonials as ” direct messages received from our customers:”
“Just wanted to let you know I received my copy in the mail today and it looks fantastic the art print is getting framed and hung in my game room. Thank you again. I can’t wait to play it.” – Eric F.
Eric F. there didn’t say anything about the adventure. Eric F. got his in the mail. Eric F likes the art print and the way it looks. Eric F didn’t actually say anything about the adventure though, did they?
“Well packed. Carefully packed. Thanks Greg!” – Bill A.
Bill A there likes your packaging. Both well packed AND carefully packed. That certainly means a fun night ahead, right? The correlation between “I literally received it in the mail” and “a great adventure to run at the table!” is obvious, no?
“Layout is beautiful and so fantastically readable, Greg, great job!” – DTFA
A vote for reading the adventure from DTFA! I’m sure there will be many future readings of the adventure as well! And, well, layout, sure, right?
“OMG! This is awesome! Thanks Greg!” – SJ
Hey, it’s awesome! Weirdly nonspecific though. I wonder what was awesome. They seem very excitable. Maybe they think Applebees is awesome also? No specific comments about the adventure.
“Just got mine today! Love it!” – Steve J.
They got theirs. Presumably in the mail also, although, I must say, the lack of noting HOW they received it does raise my eyebrows more than a little. I do hope that the trend here is obvious, and was obvious from the second quoted one.
“I was lucky enough to get to play test and let me say it brought me back to my childhood and how much fun the OG of D&D was and still is very challenging and so much fun… Thanks.” – Vincent F.
Sounds like someone had a good DM. That’s great! I wonder if they actually played this adventure though? Or something else? Awwww, look, a direct reference to an aging person wistfully looking back at he lost days of their youth.
“Now, after having given it a 1st “Read Through” I must say, Excellent Work! Well Done! This is a great little adventure that will serve as a perfect introduction to OSRIC/AD&D, especially with the pre-gen characters. Thank you! I’ll be looking forward to the sequel.” – Joseph Y.
Maybe the closest to an actual comment about the adventure. Again, very non-specific about what is excellent and what is well done. At least they, unlike everyone else, actually read the adventure?
“Just got mine in the mail and I couldn’t be happier! Really nice job, and ahead of schedule.” – Rob H.
The take away here, for everyone actually writing good adventures, is that no one gives a fuck about your quality. They care about getting it in the mail and ahead of schedule. Well, presumably tat’s the baseline anyway. I should hope that writing something good raises the floor a bit in what one can expect … as long as you deliver it. And Early.
“I have to say this was one of the fastest campaign completions I have ever seen!” – Aaron T.
Again and again and again, we can see the important of commerce and not anything actually related to the adventure.
“I received mine today – looks great!” – JBCTCJoe
And again.
“I received my physical copy in the mail this week! It arrived in great condition, your packing skills & package nomenclature (DO NOT BEND) precede you, Greg!
What the fuck is obsession here? I guess you can make $6k a month slopping out adventures as long as you ship it with a DO NOT BEND on it.
The module itself is a work of old school trade dress & format beauty & I cannot wait to dive into it! Thank you so much for this!” – Robert W.
Our final comment. An appeal to nostalgia.
Do you think it’s weird that NOT ONE PERSON commented on anything specifically about the adventure? It was all delivery and nostalgia trade dress. I think its weird that not one person said anything about the adventure. I also think its a lot weirder that Greg Gawron, Founder, Advanced Fantasy Games, selected those quotes to post. “Great commerce!” huh?
The post ends with Greg Gawron, Founder, Advanced Fantasy Games, making a direct appeal to marketing their latest and hyping it and noting that they are a good DM. That’s what it means when you run an adventure and people have fun. That you are a decent DM, at a minimum. Or, you don’t know what polite people look like. But, no, let’s remain optimistic and take you at face value, that you are a good DM.
I don’t really give a shit man. You’re just another in a long line of slop artists churning out nostalgia crap for an aging population that doesn’t actually play D&D anymore but just reads it. It’s their money. They can do what they want with it. Make your money. But let us not pretend you are producing anything decent or for any other reason than cranking out the old bank account. Not on this site.