By Greg Gawron
Advanced Fantasy Games
OSRIC
Levels 2-4
Hidden within a long-forgotten cemetery stands an abandoned mausoleum, once a place of grand splendor and solemn reverence. Now it lies broken and rotting — its roof collapsed, headstones shattered, and its glory buried beneath decades of neglect. But decay has not left this place empty. A new evil has claimed the ruin as its lair, and by fate or folly, you have found its resting place… and it now awaits your party of adventurers in The Lost Tomb of Kazcuk Mot the Undying™.
This 28 page adventure presents a small tomb with fourteen rooms that is primarily aimed at tournament play. There is a certain, physicality? to it that I find interesting, however, it’s a bad tournament adventure, with mucho read-aloud and padded out DM text with rather simplistic challenges.
It’s not every day you see someone thanking both Finch AND Taormino in the same breathe, like the credits page to this one does. I assume he went to a con and they both said some kind of Gandhi shit to inspire him to publish? I hope that’s the case. I don’t know, Taormina cranks his shit piles out so maybe it was publishing tips? Anyway, this is a tournament adventure. Tournament adventures need a few things special going on so you can judge them similarly, fairly, amongst different tables. I think that’s all bullshit and it’s like comparing a Rothko to a Picasso. “You get a prize!” Fuck that shit.
And, therein, is the issue, at least with regards to the tournament aspect to this. Let us consider two different scoring systems for a dungeon. In the first, I give you one point for each room you enter. In the second I roll a d6 for every room you enter and if it comes up a ‘1’ then I give you a point. IE: what are we measuring? The ability to penetrate the dungeon by any means possible or are we measuring how lucky the dice are for the party? Further, we must be up front with the players on what we are measuring. SHould they be tearing the place apart looking for treasure, or defeating monsters, or “winning” the plot, or trying to roll as high as they can on their dice? This adventure, of course, does not disclose the scoring to the party other than to say you get a point for accomplishments and lose a point for mishaps. And then it does things like “if you search the room then roll a d6. If you roll a 1 then the party finds a pearl necklace. They get a point.” I seem to recall that some tourney adventures went so far as to have die rolls prepared for the DM in order to make things as fair as possible across tables. Rothko does not approve. So, as a tournament adventure I think this fails to do a decent job with the scoring. The answer is not more prepared die roll and less randomness, but a different axis of scoring, I think.
Ok, so, the adventure intro also says we can use this as a stand-along adventure. How was the play Mrs Lincoln? Not as bad as one might think, given the murder of the president.
I’m not happy with the adventure, or the interactivity as a whole, but there is a certain physicality to the interactivity that I think works well. One of the entry rooms has a door under a sarcophagus that flips up. There’s a grate in the floor to go down. There’s a portcullis to lift. There’s a decent amount of this kind of physical interactivity in the adventure. Or, maybe, environmental? Whatever. There are other classic elements as well, such as yellow mold, the old water monster in a pool of water thing, and so on. They don’t feel tired in this, but I’m also open to this being because the amount of text that surrounds them. Interactivity, beyond that physicality, is generally limited to stabbing. And, even that is a bit iffy. The wanderers are bats, rats, and centipedes and they show up a decent amount. One wonders at the boredom of it all.
Otherwise, the adventure has some of the long standing usual problems with the untrained. The read-aloud can be quite long. And, of course, players don’t listen to long read aloud. It’s not a new thing. You’re boring them with read-aloud. Keep it short. It’s the designers job to figure out how. Further, the read-aloud over-reveals the rooms contents. You want the read-aloud to hint at things for the players to have their characters follow up on, not to just expo dump every little detail. at the party. You want the back and forth.
EVerything here is padded out. Every read-aloud ends with “WHAT DO YOU DO” and then immediately we get a “DM NOTES” heading. Yeah, got it man. It’s not read-aloud so it’s DM notes. Yeah, got it, the read-aloud is over so now the party and do things. The first trap takes like three paragraphs to describe, and it’s a simple stair foot pit. Ok, so, I take it back. Four paragraphs. This is a quarter of a page. For a simple trap. It’s not complex. It’s just padded out. The wanderer text is padded out. “Inside the mausoleum the characters will find ample space to move about and it may appear to be a safe place to rest and take shelter. It is not.” Jesus man, that did nothing for the adventure. It is just worthless text. You didn’t actually say anything. All you’re doing is adding words to the adventure. And these filler words and paragraphs get in the way of the ACTUAL meaningful text that the DM needs to locate in order to run it at the table. The DM needs to be able to quickly scan the text, and right now they have to dig through shit like that in order to get to the stuff that matters.
It’s just relentless. The editor is the designer, which is either magnificent, if the designer knows what the fuck they are doing, or a disaster is they do not. The designer was not born with some a priori knowledge of how to write an adventure and do layout and what makes it fun and so on. Ideally, an editor, a decent one anyway, can help with some of that. YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. You might be a decent DM. You are probably an ok guy But YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. Seek help. Seek an editor. Learn what makes an adventure a good adventure and also an easy to run adventure.
This is $20 at DriveThru. I think that’s because it was kickstarted. I’m going to, rather generously for me, NOT say this is a fucking cash grab, even though the first thing published was kickstarted at $20. That advice above? Learning what makes a good adventure, getting an editor, etc? You can ignore that. You can go down the path of filthy lucre. Just crank shit out on kickstarter the most efficiently possible and build your market.
https://www.drivethrurpg.com/en/product/562629/the-lost-tomb-of-kazcuk-mot-the-undying-osric?1892600
How does a random adventure of this apartment quality make $6k on Kickstarter? Are modules just that easy to fund?
It’s always interesting. I’m guessing the publisher has a good reputation for completing kickstarters. If I was a kickstarter type, I might back it just because it’s OSRIC.
LOL Bryce must be psychic to summon me back here at this exact moment today! Greg did a great job on his first module. He asked me (like many folks) for advice on tips for structuring KS projects and general commercial module publishing questions about artwork acquisition, printing and marketing etc. I have advised over a dozen people or more over the years who have gone on to actually make one or more of their own modules sometimes starting their own game biz etc. If anyone ever has any questions working on their own modules I can give my best hack author / game biz owner advice! Also if anyone here ever wants to check out one of my modules email me and I will send you a free pdf sample.
So… since I am here I can let you all know about my next KS campaign which is LIVE for TWO BRAND NEW FIRST & FIFTH EDITION SOFT COVERS + PDFS MODULES! The first one is “Maximum Mayhem Dungeons #18: Voyage to the Forbidden Zone” with COVER ART BY THE LEGENDARY EROL OTUS!
I told him to paint whatever he wanted and that I would write the adventure around it and that’s what you see! (We did the same thing on our “Fantastic Quest of the Whimsical One” module in 2024!)
The second is “Maximum Mayhem Dungeons – Mini Adventure #6: Caverns of the Chaotic Ones!” with amazing COVER ART BY THE AMAZING JUSTIN DAVIS aka Ka Ka Katana (he also did the Sinestra cover art). FYI… this module is definitely not a satire (ahem) of the “Caves of Chaos” concept trying explain WHY those diverse monsters were all living so close in the caves… maybe they were “working” on something… wink smiley face.
DON’T FORGET WITH ANY $25+ PLEDGE REWARD LEVEL you will also get ALL 58+ OF MY PREVIOUS PDF MODULES! That’s like a 99% SAVINGS OFF THE NORMAL PDF RETAIL PRICE! You can also use the PLEDGE OVER TIME and make your KS payment over 3 months with any reward above $115! Also I have several free PDFs you can download on the KS page so read it carefully in both page text and sidebars!
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/marktaormino/voyage-to-the-forbidden-zone-and-caverns-of-the-chaotic-ones
PS: I will be on THE DM AND FRIENDS ON YOUTUBE tonight on 06/13/26 at 6 PM PST we will be talking about various things and my new KS live for my Erol Otus module cover and a few surprises – maybe even a NEW PRODUCT line debut next week!
https://www.youtube.com/live/tzPJatCuU4Y
“Inside the mausoleum the characters will find ample space to move about and it may appear to be a safe place to rest and take shelter. It is not.”
“A group of seven men approaches. They are following the road east, and are making good time, neither tarrying nor running… They do not seem to be joking loudly or singing as they advance.”
This is a level beyond show don’t tell, it’s don’t waste everyone’s time by telling what isn’t even there to show… An entire level below even aspiring to be a BAD writer.
The underlying issue is a designer who thinks he needs to tell you what he presumes PC response will be- when we all know 1/4 of parties will relentlessy search the F out of that room in case it has secret doors, 1/4 will suddenly decide it’s irredeemably creepy and bug out instantly, 1/4 will peek in and say boring and head to the nearest dead end and 1/4 will fill it with oil and set it ablaze then worry if it’s a nice and comfy place to rest.
I could rag on it more but the deeper issue is presuming
Oh man is Maddox back reviewing kids art again?
Bryce,
Thank you for taking the time to read through some of our first release and you raise some good points. We struggled with how much text was too much in each room and felt the same about how much text needed to be BOLD in order to provide a quick understanding to the DM. Since we had a four hour delivery in mind we feel the amount of text works well, but we do feel that the amount of BOLD text could have been reduced and still accomplish the same message. We are taking a closer look at all BOLD text in our next release – The Cradle of Skulls.
Regarding the tournament scoring model we could have gone in any direction like the A! Slave Pits of the Undercity with a large number of points awarded or lost in each room -OR- as in C2 The Ghost Tower of Inverness with points awarded per hit point given, losses for hit points received, and variety of other actions that require math to tally. We chose a simple targeted scoring system for specific tasks, skill checks, items, etc. We also felt that listing them on the page at the time they become available saved the GM time. We did go with the typical scoring sheet and made sure it was accurate and consistent with the module order of events.
You are correct that there is a physicality to the adventure without a linear hack-n-slash format. The PCs can avoid certain rooms, traps, encounters, etc. and still complete the adventure which is part of the fun. We built in enough challenge that any group of PCs selected will experience loss and gain should they press forward. We used abilities of all classes, skill checks from those relevant to a crypt-crawl, and rewards specific to the classes regardless of which PC the players choose.
Our goal was to hit the market with a fun and challenging adventure that sets a new standard for Old School formats, use of cool artwork reflective of the earlier days of D&D, and other traditional things like a removable cover, blue map, challenging encounters, 12 point font for easy reading in low light, and more. However, we didn’t just put extra effort into the module itself, we also made a commitment to our customers with a quickly delivered product immediately after the Kickstarter closed. Also through our timely communications, packaging, shipping, and little details needed to earn their business again and again.
Can we do better? Absolutely! This is why each critique brings us closer to our goal of setting a gold standard in not just product, but experience, and trust as well.
Here are just some of the direct messages received from our customers:
“Just wanted to let you know I received my copy in the mail today and it looks fantastic the art print is getting framed and hung in my game room. Thank you again. I can’t wait to play it.” – Eric F.
“Well packed. Carefully packed. Thanks Greg!” – Bill A.
“Layout is beautiful and so fantastically readable, Greg, great job!” – DTFA
“OMG! This is awesome! Thanks Greg!” – SJ
“Just got mine today! Love it!” – Steve J.
“I was lucky enough to get to play test and let me say it brought me back to my childhood and how much fun the OG of D&D was and still is very challenging and so much fun… Thanks.” – Vincent F.
“Now, after having given it a 1st “Read Through” I must say, Excellent Work! Well Done! This is a great little adventure that will serve as a perfect introduction to OSRIC/AD&D, especially with the pre-gen characters. Thank you! I’ll be looking forward to the sequel.” – Joseph Y.
“Just got mine in the mail and I couldn’t be happier! Really nice job, and ahead of schedule.” – Rob H.
“I have to say this was one of the fastest campaign completions I have ever seen!” – Aaron T.
“I received mine today – looks great!” – JBCTCJoe
“I received my physical copy in the mail this week! It arrived in great condition, your packing skills & package nomenclature (DO NOT BEND) precede you, Greg! 😉
The module itself is a work of old school trade dress & format beauty & I cannot wait to dive into it! Thank you so much for this!” – Robert W.
If you haven’t run it as a GM, or if you didn’t back us and need a copy please send me your email address and I will send you a free PDF copy as a thank you for your review. If you did back us, or have already purchased a copy THANK YOU! If you have published works I would be interested in reading them. Please let me know where they may be found.
You and your readers can always locate a preview and PDF at https://www.drivethrurpg.com/en/product/562629/the-lost-tomb-of-kazcuk-mot-the-undying-osric
We have already made some of the changes you suggest in our next release, and will consider others, but keep in mind that the story-line, how it plays out at the table, and ultimately the joy it brings to players of all experience levels is really the goal. In each of the three times I have run this module in play-test and at a convention the excitement level was high, the players had fun, and the climax was real!
All the best!
Greg Gawron
Founder, Advanced Fantasy Games
$20 for an adventure with 14 rooms? Good grief, there’s so many designers out there who make great adventures with twice, three, or four-times the content, and charge less. Sometimes far less.
Kudos, Greg, for not melting down over a mediocre review, but too many people out there giving 5e products 5 stars for me to trust random people praising the look and packaging of the product.