By Mark Taormino Dark Wizard Games OSRIC Levels 1-3
Enjoy those fucking hill giants at level one, you fucking idiots!
The Hamlet of Taldren has been a peaceful settlement for many years, however dark times have fallen upon its denizens. Roving bands of Ogres have been raiding the stockpiles and animal pens in the night! It is believed they answer to a rambunctious giant living in a nearby lush green valley known as the Hill Giant Highlands. There have also been reports of strange animated fungi plant monsters appearing in the Caverns of the Wicked Peaks. Folks have even spotted bandits lurking around the ruins of Sternholm Keep and wandering skeletons in the old cemetary in the Forest of the Fallen Oaks. The villagers have cobbled together a ragtag group of willing adventurers to put an end to these dastardly fiends wherever they spawn. Fame, fortune and glory await those brave souls who can defeat these evil monsters and restore order to the Village on the Borderlands!
This 64 page adventure describes a village and four small dungeons. It represents all that is wrong with the universe and I literally do not give one shit about it.
Fucking garbage through and through, that’s what this is. A complete insult to every other adventure ever written, the last fifteen years of the internet, and every bit of common sense that should be available to even the most casual fan of Dungeons and Dragons. I hope I die before I wake.
64 pages is what we get. For fifteen fucking dollars. Fifteen dollars. I’m not usually one to bitch about price, but it’s this kind of shit that gives moderately priced supplements a bad name. Why the fuck would I ever spend even five dollars on something if this is the kind of quality I can expect to get from it? Why not just pirate the fucking thing since it’s going to be garbage anyway. Sure, tell yourself you’ll pay for it if its good, whatever gets you through the night. The real issue is that this dude took fifteen dollars from me and gave me this great steaming pile of shit. Why ever buy anything? Just take the shit they shovel down your fucking throat and be fucking happy that they didn’t also kill you when they fucking did it. Expectations. Don’t have any. Ever. Just expect that you are burning your fucking money. If anything else happens then be fucking thrilled about it.
But, of course, the first 36 pages describe the village. An utterly boring village. I’m not even sure how you get to 36 pages describing a village. Oh, wait, I know, you describe fifteen farmers hovels. All idyllic. All with chicken and all french country kitchen and tuscan kitchen. No, don’t get your fucking hopes up, the descriptions aren’t that good. Oh, they are long as all fuck. Long, overlong, read-aloud. And long DM text. Paragraphs. Long ones. With lots and lots and lots of bolding. Of Entire sentences. Multiples sentences at a time. Half of a long paragraph bolded. Whats the fucking point of doing this? You’re calling attention to what exactly? That there’s a jar of pepper on the shelf? It’s a fucking abomination. Theres NOTHING going on in this place. NOTHING. Take this, one small snippet from an overly long DM text that happens after an overly long read-aloud about Yet Another Farmers Hovel “He is looking for extra money so he may offer to sell the PCs his Potion of Water Breathing for a reasonable price (GMs discretion). His wife is dressed in a modest, but well-kept dress that hints at elegance despite its simplicity and her blonde hair is tied back in a neat bun” You could have fucking done something with that. But, nope, nothing. The highlight is a druid that is blind. If you steal from him it’s a “moral challenge”, but, also, he’s got 400pp in a chest along with a +3 dagger and a necklace of prayer beads, along with other goodies. Moral test indeed! And these ARE the highlights, by far, so don’t go fucking telling yourself that you can handle something with that kind of content.
Oh, oh, all of the read-aloud is in second person. Everything. EVERYTHING. Second person. “
As you survey the area you can’t help but wonder what other dangers and mysteries this valley holds” Pardon me while I throw up in my mouth from the hackneyed writing and then throw up again from the second person writing.
And this extends to the writing in the dungeons. Fucking railroaded encounters. Oh, no, not that kind. Oh no it’s the absolute worst kind. After suffering through a long read-aloud about a throne room in a cave it ends with the figure on the trone standing up and saying “My blade and I have been waiting for you.” If you stumble upon some ogres in the hill giant caves then one of the read-alouds ends with “The one with the club drunkenly grumbles about him cheating as he turns around and notices your party. He speaks in Common, “Any of you want to play Knucklebones with me… hiccup?” So fuck you and fuck your stealth. Fuck your invisibility. Fuck your wizard eye and gaseous form. Fuck everything you, as a player, do. Fucking railroaded second person read-aloud. I thought I had seen everything but this is surely a new low in adventure design.
Page long read-aloud. Quarter page read-aloud. That throne room? The art above the room entry shows a skeleton dude on a throne. Turns out though that it’s just a normal human dude. Perfect. The art is not just not contributing to the adventure it is actually working against comprehension. Just the fuck what I want in an D&D adventure.
It’s all fucking garbage. The village. The dungeons. All trash. Second person. Too long read-aloud. Too long DM text. Bolding EVERYWHERE to the point it actually causes more confusion than not using it. Boring ass dungeon full of stabbing things and a few traps. “Use DMs discretion” advice everywhere.
This thing can go fuck itself. FIfteen fucking dollars. Fuck you man. Fuck You. Dark Wizard Games needs to get a lot smarter a lot faster.
This is $15 at DriveThru. The preview is ten pages. Check ou preview page five/real page three for an idea of the bolding issues, but, imagine MORE bolding.
https://www.drivethrurpg.com/product/453131/Village-on-the-Borderlands-1E?1892600
No The Worst EVAR? NioMy Life is a Living Fucking Hell?
Bryce, it was good of you to give Mark Taormino and Dark Wizard Games yet another chance to see if there was any improvement in module quality – unfortunately there is clearly no improvement! Mark and Dark Wizard Games go do your homework by reading and running a number of adventures from Bryce’s The Best list!
Now I can take criticism as an author but this was just beyond ridiculous and distorted to the folks reading your blog. Some of your points may be valid with grammar and stats and it does have some faults here and there maybe 20% to be generous in my opinion as the official hack writer of the module!
I will let your BLOG READERS decide if they “agree” with all of your laughable criticisms about my VotB module. To all of Bryce’s fans remember what he said that it is: “Fucking garbage through and through, that’s what this is. A complete insult to every other adventure ever written, the last fifteen years of the internet, and every bit of common sense that should be available to even the most casual fan of Dungeons and Dragons.”
Now… for the folks reading this blog, here is a link for you to download “Village on the Borderlands” 1E PDF of 64 pages for FREE and see how “accurate” this reviewer Bryce is on this one. Read it and you will be able to do a first hand examination and in YOUR OWN PERSONAL OPINION ask yourself HONESTLY the following questions: “Do I agree 100% with Bryce’s review?” and “Do his opinions of this module REALLY match my own now that I have read it myself?” and “Would MY players enjoy this?”:
Village on the Borderlands 1E PDF:
https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/31fx13l6xeqljwb09ew1q/Village_on_the_Borderlands_1E_Combined_v1_FULL_RELEASE_07_27_23.zip?rlkey=3zquovaetyptnt8jlfn15uh4m&dl=0
Here is what the physical book looks like:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4nVI7AfZMY
And if you want to see an honest review of the module with good and bad check out this video here which calls it “… one of the more charming fantasy villages available”:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vsiHse7JlQ
And here is what the actual fans of my modules say about them:
https://www.darkwizardgames.com/testimonials.php
I will strive to improve any grammar or stat issues in my books but I will continue make the modules and story lines my way that my true fans love. Good day sir… and PS I will still send you all the modules in PDF for free if you like! Save your money, kid!
Looks like it made $33k on Kickstarter. This dude has found an audience or at least can market his adventures.
I’ll try not to think about all the ways $33K could have been better spent …
That should get you a week solid of hookers and blow
Does level 1-3 mean start at 1 end at 3, or that it works for a mix of PCs between levels 1 to 3? Not that it makes much difference against giants… just curious.
Wait. $33K? How is that possible? Who is the audience (in a super-saturated RPG adventure market) that is clamoring for this?
Is the writer a celebrity? WTF?
I think (from quickly scrolling through the campaign), that the premise was that the village is going to be a dynamic and lively locale. I guess people liked the idea. Slap some old school art to go with it and raise 33k.
Step 1: drop the word “Borderlands” in your product title.
Step 2: have some old-school art ready.
Step 3: exploit grognard nostalgia.
Step 4: ???? (Normally, produce good module, but let’s be honest, that’s optional.)
Step 5: Profit!
Step 4.5: Pray to the D&D gods that the nostalgic grognards DO NOT search for reviews of your previous modules by either Bryce, Prince or Melan!
“Is the writer a celebrity? WTF?”
ummmm… yes actually…. he is an actor (shorts and music videos mostly) who has worked with Keisha, Lil Wayne, and Jenna Jameson to name a few. He has a Hollywood following and is a bit of a jack-of-all-trades. He targets people who want old school trappings and things that “aren’t politically correct” so the audience of grognards is already built in.
Does make sense.
The Garbage culture = $$
But Bryce, the module comes with 16 recipes!
Good heavens.
Some people love recipes like that. Not for me, but that doesn’t make it wrong.
Two examples:
1. https://www.amazon.com/Heroes-Feast-Official-Dungeons-Cookbook/dp/1984858904
2. https://www.amazon.com/D%C3%BCngeonmeister-Cookbook-RPG-Inspired-Recipes-Ultimate/dp/1507218117
This is incorrect and displays your lack of knowledge of adventures. The purpose of an adventure is to run it at the table. That’s it. While it is theoretically possible to include recipes in an adventure and not detract from the adventures quality, what actually happens, 99% of the time, is that the designer focuses too much on the recipes, or some other aspect of the adventure, to the detriment of the adventures overall quality. So, if the adventure was good I suspect the recipes wouldn’t even be mentioned. But, it’s not good. or even close to good. And thus the question is raised: what if the designer spent his time on honing the adventure rather than fucking about with recipes?
It’s interesting that you think the sole purpose of an adventure is to play it at the table. Actually, the goal is to have fun. If some people enjoy recipes, there’s nothing wrong with including them. They might even make the food and enjoy it while playing, which could enhance the experience. You should give it a try. Who knows? Maybe you’ll enjoy it so much you won’t cuss as much with your mouth full.
Again, you bring your Newtonian views to the Quantum department. Fun is a subjective experience. Are the players in a good mood? How many dicks did the DM have to suck today? Many things can contribute to fun. Yes, to a degree everything is subjective, however I keep a list of standards for good adventures and abide by them in my reviews. We attempt to have judge based on that, a thesis that we defend time and again in reviews. The number one complaint of adventures is not that they are not fun, it is that they are hard to run. It IS the purpose of an adventure, to be an efficient and effective mechanism to enable fun at the table. That comes down evocative writing that helps a DM imagine and communicate the surroundings, a formatting and writing style that makes it easy for the DM to locate information during play, and interactive elements in the adventure.
Bryce, the recipes are safe, relax. lol
If you do want what is the best of Mark’s products…I highly recommend
Monsters of Mayhem #1. It’s pretty darn good. Art and formatting are both really nice.
Thank you for that I appreciate it!
Wow, you had me laughing hysterically at your wildly misleading, hate filled review of my Village on the Borderlands module! I get it… “man-child RPG rage reviews” – it’s your funny shtick in life and AVGN would be proud if he knew who you were. I stumbled across your blog today as I just ordered another mass physical print run of my VotB 1E modules to fulfill recent website and retailer orders for my Dark Wizard Games website.
Now I can take criticism as an author but this was just beyond ridiculous and distorted to the folks reading your blog. Some of your points may be valid with grammar and stats and it does have some faults here and there maybe 20% to be generous in my opinion as the official hack writer of the module!
I will let your BLOG READERS decide if they “agree” with all of your laughable criticisms about my VotB module. To all of Bryce’s fans remember what he said that it is: “Fucking garbage through and through, that’s what this is. A complete insult to every other adventure ever written, the last fifteen years of the internet, and every bit of common sense that should be available to even the most casual fan of Dungeons and Dragons.”
Now… for the folks reading this blog, here is a link for you to download “Village on the Borderlands” 1E PDF of 64 pages for FREE and see how “accurate” this reviewer Bryce is on this one. Read it and you will be able to do a first hand examination and in YOUR OWN PERSONAL OPINION ask yourself HONESTLY the following questions: “Do I agree 100% with Bryce’s review?” and “Do his opinions of this module REALLY match my own now that I have read it myself?” and “Would MY players enjoy this?”:
Village on the Borderlands 1E PDF:
https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/31fx13l6xeqljwb09ew1q/Village_on_the_Borderlands_1E_Combined_v1_FULL_RELEASE_07_27_23.zip?rlkey=3zquovaetyptnt8jlfn15uh4m&dl=0
Here is what the physical book looks like:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4nVI7AfZMY
And if you want to see an honest review of the module with good and bad check out this video here which calls it “… one of the more charming fantasy villages available”:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vsiHse7JlQ
And here is what the actual fans of my modules say about them:
https://www.darkwizardgames.com/testimonials.php
I will strive to improve any grammar or stat issues in my books but I will continue make the modules and story lines my way that my true fans love. Good day sir… and PS I will still send you all the modules in PDF for free if you like! Save your money, kid!
Hi. I think it shows that you believe in your product when you give it to us for free to judge. I chose to go into it with an open mind, although I agree with Bryce some 90% of the times in general.
I struggled. I gave up reading on page 10, where there is a read aloud that goes for 2 pages. But if the rest of the village continues like the first 10 pages, I’ll tell you my honest opinion.
1. Read alouds are horrible. Second person and long is a terrible design choice in 2024 when aclaimed products have shown us how much easier it is to run a terse document.
2. General wordy issues. You spend 2 paragraphs to tell us about a house that its only interest is that the NPC can identify gems. You can do this in 1, 2 sentences. Use bullets even.
3. The bolding is truly working against the reasons and benefits of using bold letters.
May it be some good content in your document? I don’t know. As I said I was appaled by the read aloud at page 10 and gave up. I guess it’s possible. But not in this format.
What I think is the main issue with the adventure though, is the tone of your replies half a year later. It shows you cannot take bad reviews and criticism and just enjoy the good words that come from people who enjoy your work, ignoring the other side.
Ok I will take your notes and seek improvement in those areas. Keep in mind these 1-3 points you mentioned are all personal likes and dislikes. Some folks may not like them and others do. So I’ll just have to accept that.
I have had PLENTY of fair and honest reviews pointing out good and bad in my work that’s fine I never argued with them, but as to why I am responding now is this is first time I found this review (and yes I know he also trashed my other 3 modules Secret Machines of the Star Spawn, Dread Swamp of the Banshee and Shadow of the Necromancer).
Also I have never had such an unhinged “professional” reviewer throwing his tantrum and telling people to “steal” the product and throwing out the F-BOMBs at me – like a petulant child:
“This thing can go fuck itself. Fifteen fucking dollars. Fuck you man. Fuck You. Dark Wizard Games needs to get a lot smarter a lot faster. Fucking garbage through and through, that’s what this is. A complete insult to every other adventure ever written, the last fifteen years of the internet, and every bit of common sense that should be available to even the most casual fan of Dungeons and Dragons. I hope I die before I wake. Why not just pirate the fucking thing since it’s going to be garbage anyway. Sure, tell yourself you’ll pay for it if its good, whatever gets you through the night.” – Bryce a.k.a Professional RPG Reviewer
I first replied professionally but I did have to drop down to his petulant child tantrum as well. I will seek to improve the points you mentioned and thanks for checking it out!
Well, this “professional” made all of a couple of hundred dollars last year, 80% from the Patreon. After website expenses I’m in the hole. “We gotta start charging more for this ice!”
Let’s look at that “opinion” comment you made, Mark. Sure, I can accept that it’s just opinion. Everything is. I’m even down for the fact that non-Aristotelian logic can have value, meaning math is subjective. And it’s also the case that when 99% of the population declares that “not eating feces for breakfast is good” then we can, as a matter of course, declare as a truth that not eating shit for breakfast is a good idea. The alternative leads to the arch-heretic Derrida.
So, points one one through three are only opinion in as much as, yes, everything is opinion. Otherwise, the general consensus of the community is that they are valuable. Much in the same way that you are allowed to order your expensive steak well done.
I read through it, skipping the cookbook, and here are my honest thoughts in no particular order.
1) The Shambling Mound is a guaranteed TPK for a 3rd level party. As stated it just appears in melee. It has 9 HD, AC 0, is majorly resistant to damage, and deals out massive damage.
2) The 0-level/first level commoner peasants are FANTASTICALLY WEALTHY. The laborer with a large family? The guy that digs ditches and hauls hay for a living? He has about 4,700 gp in wealth and a Ring of Telekinesis. Others are as rich and there are a TON of magic items in the villagers’ simple huts. Its like they found a dragon that died of old age and split up its loot. If the villagers combined 1/20th of their cash and just the magic items listed as ‘the owner might sell’ they could HIRE a 7th level party to solve all the village’s problems.
3) Why are there 4 bandits hiding behind a pile of rubble waiting for adventurers to start clearing out the rubble? All they are guarding is a pool of piranha. They can’t attack unless someone else digs out the rubble or THEY do. Any why do they have 3-4 chests of treasure with them?
4) Why doesn’t the paladin obey the rules on not accumulating excess wealth? How does a 1st level fighter have 16 HP?
There’s more like that, but I think this is enough of an example.
Marks post got caught in the comment URL spam filter, so he double posted. I just approved them both
Bryce you are the goat
Release the kickstarter!
Ask Kelsey for help!
Yeah, I know I suck. It’s the hookers and coke.
I’m stuck on writing up good examples. And then finding bibliography resources.
I retire from work in ten months. Except more work then.
Yes DO THE KICKSTARTER unless you’re SCARED LOL. If it looks anything like your logo for this AVGN forum here with the “stick figure” art and a blurry Tomb of Horrors image then… WOW you are a real professional! I can HARDLY wait to see YOUR MODULE ONE DAY if you ever get the courage to write one and show us all “what is what” since you are the expert on module writing! It better be one GODDAMNED FANTASTIC module that uses no traditional fantasy tropes since you hate those! FYI I am doing my module business as my only full time income job since last year. I hope one day you can do the same my super talented friend.
Mark, I understand you’re very angry. I’ve reviewed about 5000 adventures at this point. And I say that not to say that you should do what I say, but, rather, that perhaps there are people who might have opinions other than you do. You don’t have to do what someone says but, also, maybe pay attention. Consider the alternatives and give it some thought and see how it impacts what you are doing. And, a little research would have shown several I’ve written.
On another note, how are things going buddy? In your personal life, I mean? I’m a little worried about you.
Not very nice to ask a Rape Review victim how they are. Lot’a F’s in this “Review” Bryce. Not super conservative. And from what you’ve also said, your “Reviews” are just your opinions, which means you have over 5000 opinions. Me to. Unshared. How many individual modules have you played to justify your opinions? How many have you run? How many campaigns? How many one-shots? 5000+ opinions is a lot but are they just D&D modules? I’ll be checking them out now. What about other ttrpg system “Reviews”? I’m confused that you can think such abusive opinion sharing would make sense for any future version of you that tries to publish anything.
Actually that’s a pretty severe critique of this module. The module says for levels 1-3. So I am assuming the Hill Giant is a boss for the end of the quest and BTW, he doesn’t look all that tough. He’s got 35 HP. Also, compared to the original Keep on the Borderlands which featured a minotaur, I don’t think the new module is that far off base.
I’m thumbing through the module and I love the 1E style artwork. The village is actually better fleshed out than the original Keep was. If you don’t like the module you have a couple choices – 1) Change it to your liking [the DM can do that, ya’ know???] or 2) shelve it and don’t buy anything from the author again. Why trash the author?
By the way, thanks for the review. It got me to actually look at the module, and I like what I see. I’ll probably be BUYING this one.
Oh, and one more thing – you sound like the guy in the ‘falling off a bike’ meme that sticks a stick in his front tire and then wallows in self-induced pain and victim-hood.
Well said.
Checked out the free download provided by Mark. Read through the whole thing. In a word – bland. In two words – very bland. I have to side with Bryce on this one, though perhaps not with the hyperbole.
Reprising Keep on the Borderlands is as old as the hobby. It’s akin to rewriting Moria. How many iterations does the hobby need?
OK. What parts? Please inform me so I can improve my writing. Seriously… let’s not talk in vague generalities or hand pick one villager home encounter like Bryce did or twist some other singular encounter. Get to specifics if you really READ ALL 64 PAGES and didn’t just skim them. Cover each area in at least one sentence as to what was bland: The Village, The Inn of the Whistling Pig, Sternholm Keep, Hill Giant Highlands, Forest of the Fallen Oaks and Caverns of the Wicked Peaks.
“What parts?”
All of it.
I had a look at the PDF of this, I’ve seen modules from this company before and I’m a lover of old school modules, so after this harsh review I thought I’d have a look.
I can’t say I agree. The module looks like the originals, lovely blue maps, similar layouts and it reads pretty well to me! I’m guessing that as a 0 module it’s setting the scene for a series and I looks like a decent base to me.
I really can’t see what’s so bad about it. Having looked I’m actually tempted to buy it and the rest of the series!
And I’m skint!
Chris, your love and support of Dark Wizard games is clear. It’s good for Mark to have a friend and laudable of you to come out in support of him.
I must say, though, that you are everything wrong with the world. Blue old school maps, really? That’s your standard for something being good? Looking like the originals is the mark of quality?
We play D&D here, not collect it.
Bryce I’ve found quite a few good adventures through you and Mark was real foolish to get upset over your post and link people here as nothing positive is really going to come out of this.
But you really seem to have a hard on for putting the hate on Marks stuff. Which Ifind off putting as you seem to picking on his weaker releases really hard and I do agree that this module was one of them.
Two of his much better releases were Vault of the Dwarven King and Palace of the Dragon’s Princess the former I was able to incoporate in my long running campaign and my players did have a blast going through it.
At this point though with Mark’s unprofessional response and your straight up angst towards the rest of his stuff and referring to Chris is very uncharitable and speaks to your own lacking. I think this well is sufficiently poisoned at this point.
So if anyone else wants to check out those two modules I mentioned here’s a link to a video review that got me to pick up both of them. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqzRixRCUI8&t=2s
Realized the second module I was talking about was in a different video. Whoops.
https://youtu.be/HEnYWyldBdc?si=9EXLWVLtyg4Ui8wZ&t=258
But thinking more on everything I’ll say this:
Mark if your still reading these you take money for a product where as Bryce just writes his thoughts on a public blog for free if not at his own cost as such there more expectations for you to behave professional and while Bryce’s language is very caustic when he’s not pleased its not a excuse to link people who buy your stuff to a unfavorable review to comment and a pretty bad look.
Bryce it’s fucking annoying that your getting shitty comments suddenly popping on your blog I get that but could you save the caustic language for the ones being shitheads or your reviews I get that your language is something that draws folks to your reviews but not a great when directly communicating with comments you disagree with if that person isn’t being an asshole.
Thanks for your advice and kind words on my Vault of the Dwarven King and Palace of the Dragons Princess! Once again I apologize for losing my cool on blog here by matching the same level of bad language as the review etc to everyone again and thanks for all the feedback with stat corrections etc I’ll work in as many as I can in the next v2 version. Some folks like my modules and some don’t so that’s OK.
Bryce,
What the fuck is wrong with you? Why can’t you let people enjoy what they like without insulting them? The blue old-school maps are wonderful and bring a sense of nostalgia that many players appreciate. Your comment, “everything wrong with the world,” is rude, disrespectful, and just plain wrong.
People have different tastes and preferences, and it’s essential to respect that diversity. Constructive criticism is valuable, but it should never cross the line into personal attacks. Let’s focus on enjoying and improving the RPG community rather than tearing each other down.
This is awesome. I bet views on your site are skyrocketing over this drama! lol
I don’t get shit from the comments on this site, so the site views don’t really matter. Like the tagline says, I pay for this all out of my own pocket. There’s no shilling here.
Why? Because you’re wrong. And your wrongness infests the hobby. It fills it with garbage and drowns out any semblance of quality. We must all wade through the neck high much to find something decent to play.
You’re the one that just said a well done steak is great and I should respect you for it. Sure man, everything in the fucking universe is subjective. But that means we can never have a critical discussion about things. And, thusly, someone asserts that med-rare is best and well done is a travesty because X, Y, and Z. And others are free to critique that and attempt to rebut it. That’s what a fucking discussion is. There is no discussion when we must say that a monkey at keyboard is the same quality as OU, because we must all get along. No. I will not stand by while blue maps are the standard for which we judge an adventure. We do not do that here. We examine their usefulness as a tool at the table for running an adventure. I note this is different than Marks success in SELLING an adventure. Which he is clearly doing a great job at. But not because of their utility at the table.
And while, generally, I would agree with you that personal attacks should be avoided, sometimes, when hucksters are involved, I bend that rule. The designer wrote a piece of shit adventure is different than the designer is a piece of shit. Except when the motivation is ripping people off.
I think, now, my motivations are clear, yes? I disagree vehemently with “Well, I liked it.” There’s no accounting for taste.
If views don’t matter to you, why keep the site up? Either take it down or admit that reaching more people helps spread your opinion.
I understand your desire to sift through the muck to find quality. It feels like I have to do the same when reading your reviews, so I can appreciate the challenge you’re describing.
You claim you won’t stand by and judge adventures based on their blue maps, yet that’s exactly what you did.
Mark’s sales reflect his understanding of his target audience and their expectations. You may not be his target audience, but that’s okay. You may not like his work, but plenty of others do.
I do not dispute Marks success. It is a well known fact that the publishers write adventures to be read and that they know that most won’t get run. Thus, writing them for reading drives their sales. If that is his goal then he is succeeding at it. Making an adventure usable at the table is the core conceit here.
A couple more things about this “in depth review”… Bryce says ” There’s NOTHING going on in this place. NOTHING.” Apparently he did not notice during his “speed reading” that my module actually has ton of story lines going on and anyone trying to “pretend” it doesn’t is not really reading it and is just skimming it. First of all there are FOUR complete mini-dungeons of varying areas (which can be engaged in any order of sandbox play – they are independent of each other) each one with a unique story line and boss and adventure: Sternholm Keep, Hill Giant Highlands, Forest of the Fallen Oaks and Caverns of the Wicked Peaks. There are over 100 named NPCs in village (along with a location chart unlike Hommlet and Keep on the Borderlands) along with a full Tavern and Inn filled with characters and hooks. The village has over 45 homes and shops along with the Tavern and multi-level Inn of the Whistling Pig with about 25 rooms and the module has plenty of tables of players hooks, rumors and village events going on.
For another tiny example of brainless Bryce’s bits of misleading info regarding the Sternholm Keep story line is: “The art above the room entry shows a skeleton dude on a throne. Turns out though that it’s just a normal human dude. Perfect. The art is not just not contributing to the adventure it is actually working against comprehension. Just the fuck what I want in an D&D adventure.”
Once again proof that he did not even READ that whole section of the adventure because the cursed sword that the “dude on the throne” is wielding had aged him into a skelatal human old man. So once again Bryce proved he is a complete MORON and is skimming these books to give you his bogus reviews so he can “lap” up your clicks, likes and views. The skeletal is boss Warwick Diamondfingers (and YES this is D&D a FANTASY game with awesome fantasy character names). From my book text: THE CURSED SWORD: It will also age the cursed PC by a factor of d20 years for every year the sword is owned. The only way to break the curse is via a Remove Curse or Wish spell or GM’s discretion of a clever solution from a player.”
Also he did not mention ONE THING about all of the amazing artwork in the module… Hmmm… I wonder why. Can’t say ANYTHING positive I guess.
So basically the only thing here that is full of shit and garbage is BRYCE himself. He needs to go take an EX-LAX, plop down on his golden toilet (like in my Secret Machines of the Star Spawn module – there really is a golden toilet in it) and clear the shit out of his bowels and that will free up the garbage in his brain before his next review of anyone else’s modules.
Full out tantrum in the sweets aisle…
Did not see one of those since my little one was 3
Nice job, Mark Taormino. Your shitty-ass attitude guarantees you’ll not get one red cent from me. I hardly agree with everything Bryce says and sometimes he’s caustic as hell but that’s what we’ve come to expect from him and his blog. You just come across like a petulant child. Develop a thicker skin.
Yes I agree. I got “triggered” and “unhinged” I apologize to the forum members LOL. You don’t have to support my projects I understand. If you ever change your mind (or anyone else on this forum) contact me via email and I will always send you a FREE PDF of ANY of my modules to check out! Thanks for your feedback!
I forgot to mention this is what triggered me and my attitude:
“This thing can go fuck itself. Fifteen fucking dollars. Fuck you man. Fuck You. Dark Wizard Games needs to get a lot smarter a lot faster. Fucking garbage through and through, that’s what this is. A complete insult to every other adventure ever written, the last fifteen years of the internet, and every bit of common sense that should be available to even the most casual fan of Dungeons and Dragons. I hope I die before I wake. Why not just pirate the fucking thing since it’s going to be garbage anyway. Sure, tell yourself you’ll pay for it if its good, whatever gets you through the night.”
– Bryce a.k.a Professional RPG Reviewer
Certainly that is an amazing attitude for a reviewer to have, my bad for being triggered by it everyone! 😉
After reading your review Bryce I have to honestly say that, ‘ you’re way off in your review. Mark Taormino and Dark Wizard Games have proven time and time again the original feeling and thrill of the original 1st edition AD&D game. His adventure modules have that classic old school feel and atmosphere.I’ll put it to you this way, if the adventure modules produced by Mark Taormino and Dark Wizard Games are so terrible then how come when Mark announces a new adventure module is in the works on Kickstarter it immediately gets backed/funded in less than 24 hours? Because they’re that damn good. But hey, everybody is entitled to there opinion correct?
I don’t think you can judge by how fast something is backed. I mean, it would be like saying “how come people say DM Dave creates shovelware when he has 7k patreons?”
Just because something is backed quickly doesn’t necessarily equate to quality. Some movies make hundreds of millions of dollars. Does that mean they’re good? A Taylor Swift or Dua Lipa song may be a #1 hit. Does that make it good because it’s the #1 song today? Maybe that movie or that song is just popular and popular doesn’t = good in a great many cases.
Matt, your love and support of Dark Wizard games is clear. It’s good for Mark to have a friend and laudable of you to come out in support of him.
This is obviously a shill, so I suspect Mark has posted on his own forums/socials, yes? Listing his full name and the publishers full name, each time, is dead giveaway. Which is fine; everyone needs friends to support them. But I’m not his mom. I’m some rando with $5 in my pocket to buy a D&D adventure. And this one sucked ass compared to the best being produced. It showed a complete lack of understand of what a D&D adventure is for.
Wait, I could have whined loudly about how unfair Bryce’s review was the whole time? And gotten clout for it??
I doing this internet thing all wrong! Let me try:
*ahem*
“Bryce is a big stinky meanie head who used mean words on the internet about a product I made and put out into the public. That really hurt my feelings and I think he should have his reviewer license revoked. Wavestone Keep was the greatest module ever written and has literally zero flaws, it is not a steaming piling of dog poo that was shat out by an inexperienced designer. Bryce just doesn’t understand the true genius of the nine room dungeon.”
And now the money just… starts rolling in? I’ll expect my kickstarter check in the mail in a week.
But you got all the tags at least ;).
Truly, I won the Bryce mutli-crown on my first try. All my future accomplishments will pale in comparison to this 🙂
I read the review and maybe it is with merit and truth but Bryce Mr. Pole does rarely read books so it is lies with snakes
They always say “Don’t read the comments. The comments are bad for you.”
They are wrong. You need to read the comments.
If you’re a new reader, the jaded asshole delivery style can seem really personal. Layer on some critique standards that not everyone always wholly agrees with and
hilarity ensues. Mark, I would try to find something positive to take away (no one’s perfect, right?) and let the rest roll off.
Thanks for that I read ya! Yes this is the first time I discovered this blog so now I get his “shtick” and humor. Notice how I am not even going to respond the reviews he did of my Dread Swamp of the Banshee, Shadow of the Necromancer or Secret Machines of the Star Spawn. All of my modules follow my writing style and will appeal to some and not others and that’s the way it is which is fine.
He trashed some of my modules, but another got The Best and couple of No Regerts. You have to take it in stride. Bryce is doing the Lord’s Work, but he’s just one man.
Sir. There is no need for such vulgarity. You have ruined your credibility because of it and your personal attack on Mark.
LOL!
OK. you dangled a free pdf to the grogs. I read it over.
First and foremost, like most folks here, I’m the older side, possibly on the much older side than some, started playing in’81, my group never switched to 2E, we just kept on with 1E and, in a funny twist, the game came back our way. 🙂
This is blunt and honest:
* It’s pretty; effort was put into trade dress, maps and the art is well done. I, for one, appreciate being pandered to.
* I knew I was in trouble when the module started thus:
“It’s MINE… no it is MINE… that one is MINE. No I want that one! MINE! MINE! MINE!” That’s all you and your compatriots have been squabbling about for days! Like litle spoiled children you have been arguing over treasures that you haven’t even
found yet! Your group of adventurers has been on a long and perilous journey to reach the Valley of the Moon where those future treasures are rumored to lie in wait! Finally, you have arrived at the top of a hill overlooking the lush and green Hamlet of Taldren
below. As you catch your breath and take in the view, you dream that the rumors are true of a ruined castle nearby, home to dangerous creatures and ancient treasures! But you can’t help but feel a sense of unease as you also have heard tales of a nearby giant’s lair, where a creature is said to reside with a special eye for beauty! Additionally, a sinister and creepy haunted forest that has claimed the lives of many a foolish traveler looms out there. And then there’s a mystical cave system, said to be filled with gems and oddly colored mushrooms, guarded by strange fungi monsters. As you survey the area you can’t help but wonder what other dangers and mysteries this valley holds.”
Yuck. That’s not just falling afoul of “show, don’t tell,” that’s telling, underlining and highlighting things. It’s also running afoul of The Cardinal Rule of Module Authorship: Don’t tell the Players or their PCs what they are thinking. Here, you’re literally putting words in the PC’s mouths.
* It continues;
“The residence is surrounded by a small vegetable herb garden with a few brown, black and yellow feathered chickens pecking at the ground nearby. One of the yellow chickens awkwardly stops moving around and stares at you then proceeds to get nervous and well, you know… better watch your step over there! It starts clucking and pecking the ground again then walks away from you.”
What. What are you doing here?
* The utility of bold text loses focus commencing on Page 9.
* The entire read-aloud fortune telling thing. No.
* On that note, you’ve fallen into Cult of the Reptile God’s trap of treating the village as a dungeon, where every room must be described. It’s a quasi-medieval village; there should be a handful of points of interest and move on to the meat of the adventure. 15 pages in, it’s one hovel after another – THAT THE PCS WILL NEVER ENTER LET ALONE SEARCH! Pages and pages that could have been reserved for the dungeon. We you expecting the PCs to search every house? Why treasure for peasants? Also – an inordinate amount of treasure, magic treasure (scrolls?) for farmers.
* 18 pages in, I’m having a dairy farm read aloud to me. Are you, by any chance, related to Len Lakofka? I’m having flashbacks of organizing L4 into coherence.
“It is owned by farmers Benjamin and Abergale Johnson (AC: 10, MV: 120 ft (40 ft), HD: 1d4, HP: 4,#AT: 1, D: 1-2, AL: Neutral, Languages: Common, XP: 5) They have four kids (three boys and girl) who work on the farm and two dogs,Chester and Joey.
The PCs can buy milk, cheese, and meat from his for a reasonable price, however non-locals usually get charged a bit more (GMs discretion).”
That’s just 1/10th of the verbiage dedicated to this farm (one with 5,000 gp and Oil of Slipperiness socked away for no reason). Is there an OSR version of Hârn I was unaware of and that’s what system this is written for? These are ALL the wrong details to focus on. No grog nor OSR player is going to haggle over cheese, sir, I guarantee you.
* There’s a “SIMPLE FARMERS HOUSE” (we’re now 20 pages in) with 41 lines (!) of description. Oh, and the simple farmers ALSO have treasure and a magic potion.
* If the entire interior of the “FISHERMAN’S HOUSE BY THE WATER” is in bold, then bold serves no purpose.
* The laborers in the LABORER’S COTTAGE (24 pages in, why Lord?) have a ring of telekinesis. If you don’t understand why that’s wrong, or never wondered why telekinesis is a 5th level spell, or why in the name of Zargon these “simple laborers” would ever have such a thing, then, respectfully, I don’t know what can be said for you.
* At this point, I must note that the Author has blown past and exceeded the page count of G1, the ur-example of how to write a goddam playable module – terse yet descriptive, factions, the weird, challenging high-level play even excellent art crammed in, and we’re still at the granular level of describing the moisture farmers collection of screws and bent nails.
*26 pages in, we find a HERMIT’S HOUSE with merciless overuse of bolding and MULTIPLE READ-ALOUDS, because some DM soliloquies cannot be contained in just one. On and on AND ON AND ON. Oh my God, it’s Hermot’s Houses all the way down. Mr. Author, every single one of you players is looking at their phone right now.
* 30 pages in, we’re in a tavern, with a page of read-aloud and … every corner described.
* Page 31: Another private room with two straw beds tucked neatly in the corner. Two large windows on the south wall provide a breathtaking view of the courtyard. A small table and chair rest nearby and the wooden floor is covered with some dried mud or is that blood… oh well what’s the difference?
As my son would say, “Bruh, wut?”
* You’ve named the bad guy, “Chief Grumblebutt.” No, you did. “Chief Harold Grumblebutt has everything a hill giant could ask for, a beautiful loving wife and two adorable children.” Everything is just so wrong. I’m almost out. It’s sheer stubborness at this point. SO MANY WRONG DETAILS. 36 pages in, when does the module start? I’m … I’m waiting for Godot, aren’t I?
* Page 37, finally the adventure and … this is for levels 1-3? So, why is there a hill giant on the wandering monsters list? And 2-12 ogres? Are you aware, Mr, Author, a single ogre has killed generations of PCs in The Village of Homlett? Have you, sir, actually played D&D? Well, at least the Wandering Monsters table ends with giant rats, so that’s QUITE a swing there.
* Oh dear, we’re back to telling the PCs not only what they think, now it’s what they do:
“The dead body of a human lies in a tangled and twisted mess of broken limbs in unnatural positions and is being ripped apart by four Ogres! The floor is slippery with wet blood. It looks like these bastards were fighting someone and that someone lost.
Badly. The creatures are breaking its bones and chopping it up… they notice you and attack!”
This isn’t a Fighting Fantasy book; it’s supposed to a module, which is now over as 4 ogres mop the floor with a bunch of low-level PCs (you do know, Mr. Author, that sleep affects 0-1 4+1 HD monsters?)
* Page 41, here’s the 40 HP hill giant chief with 4 dire wolves, and in the next room two more hill giants and four more dire wolves. So, this was a cruelly long Kobyashi Maru all along?
* I could go on, but it’s all more of the same. Just an obsessive level of all the wrong details and no attention put on the game, or even how the game would work (later on, these newbie PCs are attacked (the text says so) by a shambling mound). The village component is like a shopping list read TO the players, the dungeons are purely generic.
Thank you Gnarley.
I lacked the vigour to post similar specifics after reading the PDF.
Mark thinks adventures need to be written like that because N1 & T1 had obsessive village write ups so thats clearly what D&D advenures need. And apparently there is a market 40 years later of people who still want 17 pages of generic village write ups for their players to completely ignore just like the good old days.
Although I kind of love that the labourers have a ring which could either make them entirely redundant (hide it forever!) or the greatest most renowned labourers in all the land (actually use the thing you have!) and yet still live in a crappy labourers hut in the middle of nowhere and offer to give the ring away to the first randos they see.
You read almost the entire thing. You took one for the team! Joking aside, if I were the author I would find your comment even more painful because it highlights details of what is wrong. But he probably thinks “oh what does Gnarley Bones know… my fans know better”.
Sounds like his fans are throwing money at his KS simply because they’re his fans, not because of quality, or lack thereof. People sometimes back the product maker, not the product. Happens all the time. Good for him. Obviously, he’s tapped into a customer base that’s willing to pay for what he’s serving.
Fun fact… I always loved the yellow stripe modules of 1980s that I grew up playing and had been wanting to write some since the old D20 license came out in 2003 or so. I am not an expert writing or in DMing nor do I try to pretend to be (that’s why you see a lot of “GMs Discretion” in my modules) I just always had a desire to make “fun” modules like how I used to DM them in the 80s. When I started writing retro modules for professional commercial release back in 2012 with my first module Hanging Coffins of the Vampire Queen and Kickstarter I had zero connections or fans in the business nor did I even think it would be successful. No “friends” or “family” to support it. The KS barely made its goal of $2,500. In fact, before it reached the $2,500 goal, when myself or the backers were not sure that it would make it, I literally had random backers who did not know me messaging me telling me that if they had to they would put in a higher pledge to MAKE it happen. I was like wow, I hope I can deliver for these folks a great product. Fortunately they did not have to add any more and naturally it and ended up at $2,700+ and was successful.
After I delivered the book the backers started asking me to “make more” even with its stat flaws, major railroading, grammar problems and other issues. But people liked what they read and the physical quality. Next I made Secret Machines of the Star Spawn and they all came back along with new people discovering my work and then they asked for more. Next and I made Villains of the Undercity and they all came back along with new people discovering my work and asked for more. And I kept growing a fan base as it kept growing like that with me making module after module. Now as of 2024 I have published about 20 modules.
So “no” they are not supporting the books because of “me” they support them because they like to buy them and run the modules with their gaming groups who enjoy them. Not because they have a yellow stripe or familiar look (that alone does not make sales and if you think it does then try it on your own). I know this is probably an unfortunate “reality” for some of the folks on this blog to accept but there are folks that like my products for the stories, characters, physical high quality of the art, maps and presentation. Some of my KS projects made more or less than others sometimes it depended on the product or the economy. People seem to like lower lever modules like 1-3 as well e.g. Shadow of the Necromancer did $26,000 on KS. Village on the Borderlands did $33,000 in gross sales on KS and I still sell it routinely on my website and am in the process of doing its second physical print run as we speak. I sell out of all of them and always reprint them for new orders.
I forgot to mention… In response to “The Middle Finger of Vecna” saying:
“Sounds like his (Mark’s) fans are throwing money at his KS simply because they’re his fans, not because of quality, or lack thereof. People sometimes back the product maker, not the product. Happens all the time. Good for him. Obviously, he’s tapped into a customer base that’s willing to pay for what he’s serving.”
Actually I wish but not in my case. If that were true then each of my books and KS projects would always go up in money when they always raise different amounts. The REALITY is they are backing my books because they like my writing, stories, characters, art, maps and the high production quality of my books.
Now when Bryce does his first “professional” module then all of you folks WILL be backing it because of the author (you know… gotta support the team) not because of the adventure or production quality. Especially if it is the same “high quality” as his “The Black Maw” adventure(s) which he oddly uses the fake name of “Craig Pike” as the author (why not use your real name bro) and looks like a 3 year old made them with the crayon art, maps and encounters.
Sir, let things end on a good note.
“I do NOT recommend this method to anyone. Nor do I think Black Maw represents what a good adventure should be. It’s just an experiment, performance art if you will, to see what can actually be accomplished in about an hour. Also, no, the primary writing is not that hard.”
https://tenfootpole.org/ironspike/?page_id=6330
Fair enough, Gnarley Bones… Fair enough! 🙂
Thanks for your specific feedback Gnarley Bones I appreciate it. The writing style is just the way I do it with the humor and 2nd person stuff (sometimes I write it like I was speaking to the Players myself DM-ing). I will work on improving stat and grammar issues. I just always figured DM’s would adjust around any stat issues etc. The reason I had detailed each 100 NPCs and their cottages was because Hommlet and Keep maybe were lacking in that area. Large read alouds may not appeal to experienced DM’s but new DM’s may appreciate having all that to work with. Once again this is a good teachable moment that my style appeals to some people and not others! As the famous quote goes, “You can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can’t please all of the people all of the time!” Thanks again for taking the time to read it!
Hey Mark, I’m doing a deep dive into your adventure as well. It’s becoming too long for this comment section (on 4 pages so far) so will tell you when I’m done and can message you or post it on my blog or on Bryce’s forums or something. Got visitors in town, so may be a few days.
Overall, I’m in total agreement with Gnarley Bone’s assessment (and Reason’s comments), BUT I’m focusing more on suggestions, tips, and specific examples to try and keep your style but help improve your approach and a few layout suggestions. The art so far looks great.
Mark, I hope you take Malrex’s offer seriously. He has a tremendous track record of producing high quality adventures in terms of content and layout and his insights (and, more importantly, suggestions) are going to go a long way toward growing as an author and publisher of OSR adventures.
Ok thank you Malrex and WR I appreciate it. Have a great weekend!
email sent to info@darkwizardgames.com with my assessment.
And damn WR Beatty–made my day, thanks man.
I don’t have time to address all of these but this one in particular: “Chief Harold Grumblebutt has everything a hill giant could ask for, a beautiful loving wife and two adorable children.” That is supposed to be a joke. You must have missed reading the part of the module that states “Grumblebutt he has a keen eye for beauty” as his wife and kids are ugly. The running joke with that Hill Giant Boss character is that all of his monster trophies on the wall have ugly faces and he is looking for the “perfect” adventurer trophy for his wall and that will end up being the PC with the lowest charisma score when they encounter him. He blurts out… “Your face! The BONE STRUCTURE is INCREDIBLE! I must have it mounted on my WALL!”
But are you writing a joke adventure? Because it comes off jokey.
Styles are styles, and people appreciate different styles. What I was trying to get at in my review is I felt (in my own free-to-be-casually-disregarded opinion) that you spent far too much time and page space on entirely the wrong details. Vivid page-long descriptions of hovels. Then, the dungeons, where the action is supposed to be taking place, are really generic and (again, just my opinion) not well thought-through.
There is a school of thought that modules for Player Characters Levels 1-3 means that you’re supposed to start with 1st level PCs and by the end , perhaps survivors hit 3rd level. Another school posits that the level range means that PCs of 1st through 3rd level are appropriate for the module – I belong to the second school.
No experience is gained in the first 30 pages of the module – unless you’re running it for murder hobos and, realizing that the serfs have rings of telekinesis, they ransack the village door to door. So their coming to the dungeons at either 1st level or perhaps a smattering, depending on what school one attends.
But it doesn’t matter. Four ogres will, themselves, wipe out the party. Multiple hill giants and wargs cement a TPK. That’s poor design. The potent spells 3rd level casters can come up with are sleep (doesn’t work on said wargs or giants) or web (which *might* help, but might not with a hill giant’s 19 strength and the thickness of a web cast by a 3rd level magic-user. On the cleric’s side of the ledger, hold person doesn’t work on any of those.
Ditto on the shambling mound, which is even more fearsome than a hill giant. It is not EVEN CLOSE to being a monster that automatically attacks a party levels 1-3. There is no point to that encounter.
I get that Gary made the ur-mistake, in statting out the first AD&D village, in going hut-by-hut, and then that format was used in N1, L3, etc., but in the forty years since then, its now realized that those are just wasted pages. The PCs aren’t going door-to-door to meet every serf and mud farmer, they’re not searching every hut, all of that is for naught. You do up the Big Ticket Items: the inns, the church, the graveyard, the apothecary and then you stop. Have a few paragraphs generally describing the village – sure. Have a list of the villagers and their connections and foibles – if you must, but only if it directly impacts gameplay. Wrong details.
Focus on level-appropriate encounters and the dungeon as an ENVIRONMENT, not a ecological one (I despite dungeon ecology; when players ask what the nereid has been living on, hiding in a room at the bottom of Tamoachan’s pyramid all these centuries, the correct answer is ‘tears of adventurers’). I mean, what is this dungeon providing? There have been approximately 13, 674, 392 dungeons released over the last 40 years, what sets this one apart, what does it offer that makes it unique, are there cool traps or features? Why play this?
Modules for Player Characters Levels 1-3 means the dungeon is designed for that level spread. The more characters that are 3rd level means smaller party, and if it’s a party of say all 1st level characters you will need a larger party. It doesn’t mean the adventure is designed to take a party from 1st to 3rd level.
I agree, but that actually remains, as ever, a point of argument among a subculture within a subculture famed for its propensity to argue.
Regardless, 3rd level PCs will be slain just as quickly as 1st level PCs by a shambling mound.
I’m sorry that was supposed to be funny?
Folks on this blog are confused and complaining about all this “bolded text” in GMs sections of the cottages. FYI the bolded text in the GMs section of the cottages is worded and meant to be potentially read aloud to the PCs as to the description parts inside the cottages as well as for the DMs info.
You already have copious read-aloud. Be consistent and sparing with bolding. As an obvious example, as you copying (again, meant in appreciative way, not pejorative, I like Old School Dress), TSR typically bolded room names, magic items and spells. At times, bolding was extended to all treasure – and that’s it.
Normally I do that but in this one I bolded text in the GMs section of the cottages and worded it to be potentially read aloud to the PCs as to the description parts inside the cottages as well as for the DMs info as to not have to create another boxed text area.
Mark, we are all very happy for your success. That there is a demand for your modules fills me with a certain encouragement. However, Bryce is not measuring sales figures. Surely you wouldn’t agree that a module by WotC is significantly better than any of yours simply because it sells more?
Anyway, inspired by Gnarley Bones, I decided to have a quick look at the PDF myself.
* I started with the cottage descriptions. Page 1, item 1 – Small Farmhouse. When you playtested this, was it important in your game to specify that Martin and Sally Parker (farmers) are “usually in the fields during the day and at home sleeping at night”? If you think this is important for the DM, how come the description of Levi and Sarah Brimley (also farmers) does not specify that they farm in the field and sleep at night? Do they also eat food? Walk using their legs? At least be consistent in your approach.
* Ok, let’s leave the village and get to the actual adventure. I skipped past the art of a man who is so old that he looks like a skeleton, as in an actual undead skeleton with glowing eye holes. Because that’s what happens when you age.
* Purely at random, I picked page 50 to read:
5: Undead attack.
* The magical trap with the skeletons could be an encounter with a twist – but no, it’s just 4 skeletons to fight! What happens if the PCs do or do not disrupt the magic circle? The module doesn’t say. There isn’t even any guidance telling me that as the DM I can just make something up! This is sarcasm – of course I can always make something up, but as the designer, you should have provided the details.
* Instead you have written out “Roll initiative” (in case the DM forgot the combat rules?) and “There is nothing else of (sic) here or anywhere nearby”. Is this helping the DM or just unnecessary noise?
* Then under the tree there is a sack with 6000 sp. Out of curiosity, would you let a PC carry that sack?
6: Bandit surprise.
* So, the game has rules for surprise but you are forcing a surprise encounter on the PCs regardless of how alert they are. That’s robbing players of their agency.
* The description says the bandits are “heavily-armed and armoured”. The stats say they are wearing leather armour and carry shortswords. Which is it? Oh and right at the end of the description it says that one of them has a shortsword +1 but that’s not in the bolded combat stats. So is the bandit not bothering to use his magic sword?
* The bandits “demand that the players hand over their valuables and weapons”. I’ve got a character sheet and a pencil – will that do?
* If the bandits are defeated the PCs “may find a stash of stolen goods hidden nearby, including gold, weapons and other treasure”. How much? Where is it hidden? You don’t bother to tell the DM, even though this is much much more important than how many chairs each farmer’s house has.
* Anyway, some pretty rich bandits these (magic sword, over 1000 gp plus an undetermined stash). There’s a guy down the road who just killed his buddy over 80 gp.
8: The situation.
* So in the bandit surprise, the read-aloud specifically referred to the bandits as “bandits”. Here, the dead bandit is called an “adventurer” and his buddy is just “a human male”. Sounds like the DM is intentionally tricking the players, as opposed to fairly describing what the PCs see.
* The bandit has a dagger, but of course it’s not in his stat block, and only blood on his hands is mentioned in the read-aloud. So did he kill his buddy with his namesake Blacksword, his dagger or his bare hands? I guess we’ll never know! Yes, the DM could make this up on the fly, but then the DM could also make up the number of kids that a farmer family has. Which is going to be more relevant during play to the PCs?
***
I decided to stop there. I suspect that anyone reading this blog can look up a page of the module at random and identify a similar number of issues.
I’m sorry Mark, I realise that you and your fans feel that this is some sort of subjective, personal attack – it’s not. Doesn’t mean that you can’t have fun with your module or that you need to change – you be you. But objectively, I can’t see why I would choose to run this module instead of the many other available modules.
PS. Mark, please can you rein in your fans? It is clear that they are posting here en masse. I don’t think it is acceptable to compare your state after receiving a critical review of your module with that of a rape victim, as Anon did in the post above.
Thanks for the feedback. There are several valid points but otherwise the rest are all just nitpicking every single sentence in the module we could play that game with any modules on the market especially the old ones.
For example I will pick one at random. Don’t bother wasting your time continuing I get it and we get it:
6: Bandit surprise.
* So, the game has rules for surprise but you are forcing a surprise encounter on the PCs regardless of how alert they are. That’s robbing players of their agency.
MY RESPONSE: Valid Point OK. I would assume a seasoned DM would simply ignore my mistake and run the appropriate surprise roll and move on with the game.
* The description says the bandits are “heavily-armed and armoured”. The stats say they are wearing leather armour and carry shortswords. Which is it? Oh and right at the end of the description it says that one of them has a shortsword +1 but that’s not in the bolded combat stats. So is the bandit not bothering to use his magic sword?
MY RESPONSE: NITPICK DMs discretion.
* The bandits “demand that the players hand over their valuables and weapons”. I’ve got a character sheet and a pencil – will that do?
MY RESPONSE: NITPICK Your character sheet and a pencil are not part of the PCs inventory nor valuable.
* If the bandits are defeated the PCs “may find a stash of stolen goods hidden nearby, including gold, weapons and other treasure”. How much? Where is it hidden? You don’t bother to tell the DM, even though this is much much more important than how many chairs each farmer’s house has.
MY RESPONSE: NITPICK DMs Discretion.
* Anyway, some pretty rich bandits these (magic sword, over 1000 gp plus an undetermined stash). There’s a guy down the road who just killed his buddy over 80 gp.
MY RESPONSE: NITPICK That’s right. 80gp. Murder hobos.
I forgot to mention, I will work on correcting those kinds of loose ends in future modules. Thanks!
Mark, your attitude as evinced here in your responses has been a big turn-off for me, and I suspect some others, in deciding whether to ever purchase or consider one of your adventures. I wish you the best, but I’m going to be steering clear of anything written by you.
Fair enough. Thanks for taking the time to post!
Mark, I don’t want to belabour the point, but there’s an obvious typo in “[the bandits] demand that the *players* hand over their valuables and weapons”! By itself this would just be a nitpick of course, but combined with everything else, it builds up..
The real issue with the rich bandits is that after defeating just four bandits, a level 1 party will have 3,000 gp (1k in gems, 2k from selling the +1 sword), which is enough to level one or two characters. It can literally be their first encounter upon entering the forest and it’s enough to level up! I think Gary Gygax would have had some nitpicks with that kind of gameplay too.
Anyway, if I want a village sandbox with a sprinkling of humour, I’m going to use my DM’s Discretion and run The Blackapple Brugh by Kyle Hettinger (Bryce’s review here: https://tenfootpole.org/ironspike/?p=7563).
I forgot to mention to all the folks who took the time to point out the specific encounters with issues like typos, stat problems etc, thank you. I will incorporate as many fixes to those encounters in the next printing of a v2 version. I had literally just ordered reprints of v1 a day before I found this review so when I do the next one I will include as many legit ones as possible then I will re-post an updated zip file to download. Thanks!
Good banter in the comments with a suprisingly wholesome finish. The OSR is going to be just fine.
Spoke too soon. The second reactor containment has been breached.
This review sounds like it was written in a correctional facility by a twelve year old.
Another idiot who comes here only to pour more gas on the fire. Grow up
Wait. Someone who thinks the user name “The Middle Finger of Vecna” is cool is telling someone else to grow up??? Holy fuck, dude. ????. You can’t honestly lack that much self-awareness?!?! ????
Extremely immature!
Hi, Bryce!
Do you have personal experience with what reviews written by twelve year olds in correctional facilities are like? If so, please share. Must be an interesting story.
Full disclosure – I backed this module on KS (albeit at the lowest level, because I’m a skinflint). I think something that has been overlooked in the assessment of the dangers and wealth available is that in old-school gaming not everything is meant to be killed and not all treasure can be carried out in one go. Some shit you have to run from or circumvent; some treasure has to sit until later.
I get it – many of us have gotten used to (or started with) the newer way of gaming: level-balanced combats from start-to-finish were you can fight your way through everything safe in the knowledge that nothing in it will be OP. And Heaven knows I don’t love leaving treasure behind… Hell, both times I went through The Temple of Elemental Evil I had my party buy a wagon and draft horses to haul out that sweet, sweet furniture that still looks nice in my fighter’s stronghold to this day. I’m just suggesting that some of the criticisms seemed very rooted in the “new school” approach for a review of an “old school” module.
I disagree. Chief Grumblebutt is a hill giant, in a dungeon with other hill giants (5 others, IIRC) plus ogres and wargs, and that’s not a dungeon for PC levels 1-3, so why is it there?
Ditto with the shambling mound; find a TSR module with a shambling mound that automatically attacks (or even exists!) in a module for levels 1-3.
There IS certainly an underpinning mechanic that PCs are not *supposed* to be screwing around with dials and pulleys, exhaustively mapping every inch of the dungeon, nor fighting every single monster presented. “Resource management” includes hit points. Therefore, they may well be foes that a prudent party should avoid.
Hard to do when those foes are either THE POINT of the module or, as in this case, the text declares that they attack. Worse still when these foes are utterly out of the PCs’ reach in terms of realistic opponents.
This is tone deaf cope, particularly if you read this blog.
Having a game where not everything is solved through combat is not the same as replacing all the humanoids in B2 with Balrogs and Liches and expecting it to run smoothly.
Not sure why you’re calling this “cope,” since it’s not my product, I don’t know the author, and/or otherwise have a dog in this fight beyond admitting I was a minimal buy-in backer in my opening post. I offered my 2 cents, man. You don’t like my opinion? That’s cool. But that doesn’t really qualify as “cope.”
Though now that you bring it up, I haven’t failed to notice how many responses have been met with “you must be the author’s buddy/fan/paid shill.” So, I dunno, maybe that’s just how folks on this blog roll. I’m new here, I admit, but that seems like a strange way for community to deal with folks who have even a mildly different opinion on something.
I know on some level you get that “I’m a backer” pretty much plays right into the “you must be the author’s buddy/fan.”
Why do you spend 2 paragraphs on a throwaway dismissal, and nothing on the actual rebuttal? This is not your diary. This section is for discussing the review and the adventure.
Your opinion is about as inherently valuable as anyone else’s here i.e. its worthless. The only thing that seperates a good point from a bad point is the point itself.
You beg the question: Is Tenfootpole a modern rpg review standards blog and therefore unqualified to review this adventure? Fortunately for us, he made it easy to verify that.
https://tenfootpole.org/ironspike/?page_id=1201
Fucking put up, boomer. Either it’s ‘Yes you are right’, or its ‘not wait you are wrong here’s why.’
@ Paul G.
You are correct that not everything should be placed with the expectation that the PCs defeat it in combat as the only option. There should be other ways to avoid, circumvent, or otherwise get past that encounter. That’s part of the fun of D&D. However, sticking hill giants and a shambling mound in a lvl 1-3 module is a bridge too far. Gnarley is correct. This thing is not statted out even remotely for groups of lvl 1-3 PCs. Not even close.
@Paul G.
Regardless of the authors intent, we can safely conclude that this adventure was primarily written for 5e but with a 1e / BX vibe and then lazily ported over to OSRIC afterwards. How can we conclude this?
1) There’s a 5e version available.
2) There are a ridiculously high number of overly hard monsters for the specified level range for use in OSRIC. In 5e you either have to be a really bad player or have some extremely unlucky dice rolls to die. It’s probably not that hard for the 1-3 level range in 5e. In OSRIC, it would be a bloodbath for the PCs. Sure you can run away, but you’d be much better off just running away from the whole adventure.
3) There are copious amounts of monetary treasure to be found, as in over 100,000 gp. In 5e you don’t get xp for gold, so it doesn’t matter as much. Everyone basically gets a participation ribbon just for showing up. In OSRIC, that amount of treasure is game-breaking for this level range.
So, could we fix those issues by simply upping the OSRIC level range? Probably to some extent, but for $15 for a pdf or $40 for hard copy + pdf these lazy asses simply need to do better.
Awwww, our little boy has finally learned the “f” word. They grow up so fast! And, it’s so nice to see all of his little friends coming here to support him!
I’m curious, Mark, if you would be willing/able to please give us the sales breakdown by % for this one between the 5e version and the OSRIC version? Thanks.
Yes ok! The OSRIC versions of my modules always sell better via KS and my website. I sell mainly 75% OSRIC and about 25% 5E. Keep in mind I have been building a 1E audience from 2012-present. I only started doing 5E versions since 2020-2024 with my Shadow of the Necromancer. My personal favorite is 1E and yes I have to get better with the stats and treasures but in most of my books I tell the DMs to either scale down or scale up the modules as needed if they want etc.
This is shit. Devoid even of basic competence. An Infant, a 13-year old DM on his first day, could produce better material using the random tables in the back of the DMG. Why is this travesty allowed to continue?
Chief Grumblebutt…Sally Parker. The original creators of the game of DnD envisioned worlds in the worlds of Arabian Nights, Lahnkmar, Lovecraft, Elric of Melnibone. This is DnD based off of the worlds of Sesame Street. Literally retarded fantasy that doesn’t even meet the basic criterion of functionality.
Hi, Bryce!
LOL he goes by so many fake names… Bryce Lynch (from Max Headroom) and Craig Pike to name a few.
FUN FACT: for Village on the Borderlands, I had to come up with like 130+ names for all the NPCs. The Hill Giant Chief Harold Grumblebutt was named that way because I wanted an “older” sounding name like Harold and Grumblebutt was coined from South Park’s “Scuzzlebutt.”
Bryce Lynch’s review of “Villages on the Borderlands” by Mark Taormino is a vehemently negative critique that, unfortunately, might do more to obscure than to illuminate the product’s potential value for its intended audience. The review is laden with profanity and extreme negativity, which could detract from its effectiveness and credibility. While valid criticisms exist in any review, Lynch’s approach verges on vitriolic rather than constructively critical, potentially turning away readers who might otherwise benefit from a more nuanced discussion of the product’s merits and drawbacks.
The module, designed for “grognards,” or enthusiasts of classic tabletop role-playing games, incorporates old-school maps, traditional art, and extensive narrative descriptions to support a “theater of the mind” style of gameplay. This style is favored by players who appreciate a slower, more immersive experience reminiscent of early RPGs, contrasting sharply with the faster, more combat-oriented style of many modern games. The depth of detail, which Lynch dismisses as excessive, actually serves an essential purpose by reducing the preparation time needed for game masters to create a rich and engaging campaign setting.
Regarding the price, Lynch’s frustration with the $15 cost seems disproportionately harsh. For fans of classic RPGs, this price is a reasonable investment for an adventure that not only provides hours of gameplay but also evokes a sense of nostalgia for the games of their youth. It’s not merely a purchase of a gaming module but an investment in an experience that harks back to the golden age of role-playing games.
In summary, while Lynch’s review does express a personal dissatisfaction with “Villages on the Borderlands,” his excessively negative tone and choice of language may serve more to alienate than to advise potential buyers. A more balanced, less emotionally charged critique would likely be more helpful to those trying to decide whether this module is a good fit for their gaming style and preferences.
Ed Lazor’s review of celebrated OSR reviewer Bryce Lynch’s review of the profoundly sub-standard “Village of the Borderlands” is a thoroughly mediocre apologetic for what should be a run-of-the-mill execution of an obvious failure. Where did it go wrong? The purpose of a review of a review is to illustrate the flaws in the methodology and reveal to us the mortal man, with his own sins and biases, behind the implacable facade of the omniscient Judge, Reviewer and Executioner. Yet instead of laying bare the structural shortcomings of Bryce Lynch’s approach, the review of the review only succeeds in validating it all the harder.
It is perhaps telling for a novice that the review of the review’s first point concerns tone, the refuge of the mediocre and the insufficiently discerning. Lazor’s critique of the tone is predicated on an incorrect assumption, that the primary goal of a review is to deliver constructive criticism. It does not take 5000 reviews to realize that nothing could be further from the truth. The purpose of a review is to allow the reader to make an informed decision about purchasing the product. In his hand-wringing concern-trolling about the tone of the discourse, Lazor ignores the observable fact that some work is essentially worthless, or possesses flaws in such profundity and such a dearth of meritable characteristics that it does not merit a detailed critique. In this case the vitriol is an effective shorthand for the frustration and agony that the reviewer must experience as he wades through the sewer of imbicile imagination and banal detail.
In the middle of the review, Lazor reveals how out of his depth he truly is, by claiming that the dearth of mundane detail would supposedly allow the audience to create a more believable game world and cut down on preparation time. But herein he ignores, or is perhaps unaware, that such a wealth of detail serves a supportive role and is only justified by a substantial, well-functioning adventure, which is noticeably absent in this case. It is similarly telling that Lazor refuses to address the many structural shortcomings pointed out by Lynch in his review, which strike at the heart of the adventure and would actually be relevant through play.
Last there is the issue of the price. But this is a simple matter. If the adventure were good, the suggested fifteen dollars would be no issue. But it is not good. That the adventure is on the higher end of the price range simply adds insult to injury.
In summary, while Lazor shows some promise as a reviewer of reviews and knows how to strike the odd turn of phrase, it is clear that he needs considerable practice before he will be able to practice his hobby at a level approaching that of a professional.
**/*****
Thank you for your detailed response. It’s sad when the quality of comments exceeds that of the review itself. I appreciate the opportunity to engage in a deeper discussion about both the module and the review in question.
Firstly, I acknowledge that the primary goal of a review is indeed to help readers make informed decisions about purchasing a product. However, the tone of a review can significantly impact its effectiveness in achieving this goal. While strong language can convey frustration, it can also overshadow the substantive points being made. In Bryce Lynch’s review, the pervasive negativity and use of profanity may detract from a balanced evaluation, which could help potential buyers more effectively.
Regarding the depth of detail in “Villages on the Borderlands,” I maintain that the extensive narrative and classic RPG elements cater to a specific audience that values immersion and nostalgia. For these enthusiasts, the detailed descriptions and traditional maps are not superfluous but essential for creating a rich gaming experience with minimal preparation time. It’s worth noting that J.R.R. Tolkien often received similar criticism for the level of detail in his work, yet his contributions were highly celebrated and won many accolades. This level of detail can add a profound depth and richness to the narrative, much like in Tolkien’s Middle-earth.
Your point about structural shortcomings is well-taken. If there are significant flaws in the adventure’s design, they indeed warrant attention. However, Lynch’s review seemed to focus more on expressing disdain rather than providing a constructive critique that highlights specific structural issues. A more balanced review might have detailed these flaws while acknowledging any redeeming qualities, offering a comprehensive perspective for potential buyers.
The matter of price is subjective and context-dependent. While $15 may seem steep for a sub-par product, it is a reasonable investment for those who appreciate the nostalgic and detailed aspects of classic RPG modules. It’s about the value perceived by the target audience, which in this case includes fans of old-school role-playing games.
In summary, while I respect your critique of my response, I believe that focusing solely on vitriolic language can alienate potential buyers who might benefit from a more nuanced discussion of the product’s merits and shortcomings. Constructive criticism, balanced with an acknowledgment of both strengths and weaknesses, can provide a more comprehensive and useful review.
First: The commentary thus far effectively serves as an audit to see if Bryce’s standards were correct. From everything we have observed, this is the case and Bryce is vindicated. It is indeed a substandard adventure, inferior to the majority of adventures currently available.
With tone, we come to a secondary, or perhaps tertiary aspect of the reviewing process, and this applies for tenfootpole, prince and melan in equal measure. It is not sufficient that a review contains factual information. We also look for a strong authorial voice, a bit of spice, something to keep us coming back. All three, and all three use varying degrees of spice, from mild politically tinged humor to a full on frothing meltdown in the postscriptum of the blog. There is an element of showmanship. Contrast this with the dreary, long-winded, politically correct, passive, academic style of something like Bones of Contention, which attempts to ape journalistic standards but succeeds only in serving as a cheap alternative for a soporific, and the contrast could not be greater. While as a first time reader you might experience some disorientation at the tone, from the large and stable audience, as well as Tenfootpole’s position as the dominant review blog in the OSR, it is clear you are a minority herein, and it is likely that you would acclimate quickly.
You reiterate your point regarding the background detail being a feature but even if this were the case, it is not germane to the review in question because the reviewer has outlined his criteria for a good adventure, and this type of background detail falls outside of it. You will excuse me as I guffaw at the comparison with Tolkien, for from everything we have observed, this is no M.A.R. Barker or even an Alex Macris. Is there a richly detailed, expansive setting this detail is meant to serve? Does the added background detail of what will be mostly inert material compensate for an adventure’s structural deficiencies in what will be the most heavily utilized component? If some eccentric part of the rpg gaming public desires this, by all means let them, but they do not represent the majority of the OSR gaming public, and thus the critique is made.
In responding to the critique about structure, you employ a lot of evasive language to evade the lynchpin of the argument; ‘seems to,’ ‘more balanced’ etc. You do not deny that the review offers significant structural criticism, you merely express concern on behalf of a hitherto imaginary audience that the review would be more clear if it did not have that vitriol. Given tenfootpole’s prominence and enduring commentariat, it seems self-evident that your concerns are unwarranted, and do not apply to a signficant subset of this hobby. I would even be so bold as to say that the exclusion of an audience that is unable to parse the meaning from a review after a few choice swearwords start flying is a feature, not a bug.
With the price too, you seem intent on covering the entire argument in a cloud of obfuscation by emphasizing the subjective and nonomniscient nature of the process of reviewing. However, in so doing, you reveal that you in fact concur that the only justification for the high price would be rooted in nostalgia, not the high quality of the work itself when compared to other adventures. Therefore, based on his own standards, you agree the reviewer should quibble about the price, since nostaliga is not part of them (thankfully).
Im summary, part of creating an enduring review presence online is cultivating an audience that supports and challenges the reviewer. A large part of this is attraction, but some deterrence is neccessary also. Recognizng and ignoring bad advice, or feigned concern about the tone, is key. The truth is that no amount of language manipulation will soften the financial, reputational and social blow of a negative verdict. The quibbler of tone is in actuality a quibbler of content, and uses the subjective standard of tone to blunt the knife and make the reviewer question his own standards and style. The advice itself is quitely destructive, not constructive.
As you seem to have no genuine structural quibbles with mr. Lynch’s well articulated criteria, nor with their application to this adventure in question, I must admit a bit of confusion at the ardence of your defensive action.
“It is indeed a substandard adventure, inferior to the majority of adventures currently available.”
Bryce didn’t rate it as The Worst EVAR?, My Life is a Living Fucking Hell, or Do Not Buy Ever, so, strictly speaking, this is not true.
Mr. Ass, I consider you a man, not a simulacrum of one. The map is not the territory.
“It’s all fucking garbage. The village. The dungeons. All trash. Second person. Too long read-aloud. Too long DM text. Bolding EVERYWHERE to the point it actually causes more confusion than not using it. Boring ass dungeon full of stabbing things and a few traps. “Use DMs discretion” advice everywhere.
This thing can go fuck itself. FIfteen fucking dollars. Fuck you man. Fuck You. Dark Wizard Games needs to get a lot smarter a lot faster.”
Men like us, we do not need labels to see that this thing is a reheated turd, an absolute non-effort, a chinese-knockoff of the golden adventures of old.
Run of the mill language on a day when Lynch forgot to wipe, nothing more.
Don’t worry, feeling confused is a normal reaction when the grand illusions of our ego are confronted by reality.
The standards and the draft of Book 1 show some potential. Using them to rewrite the review might help clear up your confusion. That would be more engaging than doing another Howard Stern impersonation.
Let’s face it, the showmanship was a calculated choice. Accept the criticism and aim to do better.
You have me confused with the author of the review, but then again you have a lot of things confused so this should come as no surprise.
If you want to somehow make the point that Tenfootpole is not abiding by its own standards, you should do so. Don’t just point at what is presumably (I have not read it) a large body of work and expect everyone to connect the dots. You simply have not demonstrated sufficient intelligence to merit that amount of effort, nor to offer criticism of any kind.
I reiterate an earlier point; Respond to the points made or shut up. No one is fooled by your feigned impartiality, pretend helpfulness or vapid critiques.
Having read this particular work, it is dressed in the trappings and trade dress of the Classic TSR era, but the content is purely Nu? D&D, with no care taken for actual play and a notable lack of actual game content.
Hi chatgpt!
ChatGPT says, “Hi Mister Booze! How can I assist you today?” lol
Shit, are we doing ChatGPT comments now!
I am back from vacation and can address things more directly, if folks would like to ask. I’ll start with why I hate so much. This is a three part answer.
The first is that people think I owe them something. My time. My money. My effort. My whatever. This is not true. I do not owe you anything. I suck diseased cock for a living. You don’t get to tell me what I do with my money. Or the time I would invest in it. The implication that I somehow owe you something sets me off. There’s no money here. No profit to be made. At best, I’m $1800 in the hole each year instead of $2000 in the hole. Oh, but I DID buy the adventure. And thusly, am the consumer, with all of the thoughts and opinions. that entails.
The second is the ignorance of the playing field. This is not the first time someone’s fans have shown up here to take exception with a review. What, the ninth or so time? I get that you are a fan and you like their shit. For whatever reason, you truly don’t need a reason to like something. But that’s just what it is: liking it. Over here I review with criteria in mind. Which mostly gets back to a products usability at the table. So if you make a mil selling an adventure but I think its unusable, according to my published and well articulated standards, then it may be a success financially for the publisher and a piece of garbage where playability is concerned. But, the fans just scream that they like it and don’t engage in the debate around articulable criteria. And I don’t give a fuck about that. Articulate a position and I’ll be happy to debate it, tear it apart, or acknowledge it. But it damn well better be related to the ability of an adventure to be used at the table.
In general, though, the most common form is that of the well meaning fool. You wander in to the quantum theory department talking Newtonian physics. People publish because they want to bring their vision to light, but almost always they have no idea what the criteria are to make a good adventure. And thus stumble about. And I recognize that in my reviews. There is more guidance there. You don’t know what you don’t know, but, perhaps, also, you awe it to the people you are asking money of to take some time and learn about it? Or, then, you fall over the line in to someone who doesn’t give a shit and is just there to pump out product. For this I reserve my most damning vitriol.
Welcome back from vacation.
Since you mentioned finances, have you considered approaching companies for review copies? It could save you money. If you treat them with respect, companies will often provide free review copies. In fact, if you approach it professionally, they welcome constructive criticism and advice. Receiving a free copy doesn’t bias the review; companies encourage honest feedback.
You suggested that quality is subjective, and I agree. Articulated standards are essential for meaningful reviews. Where did you publish your standards? More importantly, how did you apply them in this review? Your cussing and bashing obscured your points, making it hard to discern any detailed critique. Essentially, you said you hate it, there’s too much fluff, and not enough focus on the core content. That’s a generic review, overshadowed by drama and expletives.
Could we see more constructive feedback and detailed reasons why someone would or wouldn’t want to buy this adventure? That would be more helpful to everyone.
Seriously Ed? You didn’t think that these were detailed reasons as to why not to buy the product?
“The village. The dungeons. All trash. Second person. Too long read-aloud. Too long DM text. Bolding EVERYWHERE to the point it actually causes more confusion than not using it. Boring ass dungeon full of stabbing things and a few traps. “Use DMs discretion” advice everywhere. ”
Bryce’s standards can be found on this very blog.
About your other comment with the recipes, that’s just wrong. You can, of course, use recipes in your games. Buy the recipe books, cook them and have awesome sessions with your friends. Include them in tour world building too. All Bryce is saying, and I think all sane DMs who try to find quality products to buy, is that these don’t belong in the adventure… if they offer nothing to the product, the actual adventure.
Lareth’s favorite food is goulash. Fry the onions, add paprika and water. like what? We want to run encounters here. If we want recipes we’ll buy other d&d books. They are called supplements… or whatever, not adventures.
Yup, seriously – the drama got in the way of actually enjoying the review. You and disagree on the recipes, and that’s okay. It’s a different play style. I found the Review Standards and I’m having fun checking them out now.
I have never, and will never accept review copies. There is not way to do this without losing objectivity, even subconsciously. I pay for everything I review. I have my own skin in the game. A review copy ALWAYS biases the reviewer. I suppose it is theoretically possible it would not, but I don’t believe that, pragmatically in the real world, that can happen. There are plenty of shills reviewing adventures if that is what you are looking for.
I owe the designers nothing. I am the consumer here. I don’t really care about my audience; (sorry gentle readers!) I write here for my own purposes.
I reiterate, over and over again in my reviews why something is wrong and what good is. The standards are published on the website. There is a free draft copy of my book, (that I believe I have sent to Mark?) that goes through the criteria in detail. What more would you have me do? Dedicate my life to saving each and every bad designer? (That would, I think, take away from my drinking) The weight of over 5000 reviews has coloured and honed what I believe to be a good adventure. And while that does not mean I am the end all be all of adventure design criteria, it does mean that maybe someone should listen and consider the points, over, say, their mom. Or fans.
So Bryce, (cigar in my mouth) honey, baby, sweetheart… get some practice in the real world of making at least one physical book (not just a simple PDF) and selling it outside of your “forum people.” Hopefully your first book and crowdfunding campaign will do well since you already have a built in audience that support you regardless of the quality. I had zero audience when I started. Also it’s a lot easier to trash other peoples hard months or years of work and TALK about making a module then to ACTUALLY DO IT. Trust me, brother. Keep in mind that due to the nature of your “style of review” on 5000 modules on your forum you may have some trouble finding artists and map folks to work with you because you have trashed modules they may have worked on are may be pissed off etc.
@Mark What is the logic of coming to a ___review blog___ to criticise the author for not writing products?
Do you go to hardware stores and criticise them for not building kennels? That’s not what they do.
We get it, you don’t like the review. It hurt your feelings. Your products sell! People watch Michael Bay movies by the millions. Critics shred them because they suck. But they sell tickets.
@Ed- you want MORE specific criticisms than;
* the misallocation of effort/page count to a dull village
* railroaded encounters
* issues with threat level of unavoidable encounters
* direct advice on player agency and use of second person
* discussion of extensive read aloud
* misuse of bolding
* lack of interactivity beyond stabbing
How are those not specific enough? That’s more half a dozen specific adventure design/writing elements raised. Often with direct quotes to illustrate or support. Not specific enough?
Imagine coming to THE biggest review blog in the OSR and trying to bigdog the reviewer because you had a succesfull kickstarter.
Your work sucks compared to others dude, sorry. You lack basic competence. Suck it up and hope your audience doesn’t find out.
I hope Bryce becomes more vitriolic after this because these idiots deserve it.
Big talk when you ended up with a nothing module.
You have onion-thin skin. Respectfully, you might want to consider avoiding Reviews of your work.
Looks like he is blocking me now:
Error 406 – Not Acceptable
Generally a 406 error is caused because a request has been blocked by Mod Security. If you believe that your request has been blocked by mistake please contact the web site owner.
When I try to make a long post
You mentioned that the module was a waste of money, which might suggest a bias because you paid for it. If your primary focus is on playability, as you stated, the cost shouldn’t influence your review.
You’re right that we should expect a solid review from someone with over 5,000 reviews. I’m honestly disappointed with this one, but I’m still sifting through it for useful insights. I’m also having fun reading through your Review Standards, this part is very interesting. I’d love to see the draft of your book. Is it a thesis on how to write a good adventure, or does it focus more on the review process?
While you may feel that you don’t owe anything to your readers, offering opinions and advice does come with certain responsibilities. Dedicating your life to this seems a bit dramatic, but I hope you can find a way to monetize your expertise. Publishing your own games could be a fun and profitable endeavor.
Lastly, personal attacks and vitriol undermine your credibility. They don’t demonstrate expertise or professionalism. I’m not a groupie fan, just someone genuinely interested in quality reviews from you.
This is boilerplate manipulation under the guise of feigned interest from an incensed fan of Toramino, who seems to aspire to the parttime function of Toramino’s Grima Wormtongue.
> The cost absolutely should influence a review since it is a factor in the audience purchase decision.
>Feigned interest to disarm the target. There is no contention with the majority of tenfootpole’s criticism in the review and what is unclear is not articulated.
> Feigned interest to disarm the target. Equivocation to ignore the fact that, according to Eds own standards, Bryce has gone above and beyond the call of duty to outline his criteria and provide a rationale. Passive aggressive snipe about Bryce’s monetary success, which is laughable if you are in the know.
> Tone policing, quibbling, feigned interest and sympathy.
>You mentioned that the module was a waste of money, which might suggest a bias because you paid for it. If your primary focus is on playability, as you stated, the cost shouldn’t influence your review.
>>If your primary focus is on playability, as you stated, the cost shouldn’t influence your review.
That is the single dumbest take I have every read in my life. Of course the price should influence a review on playability. The rest of us shlubs have to pay that price for this garbage. If Bryce didn’t pay for all the adventures he reviews, he wouldn’t be able to accurately say whether they were worth the money or not. Review copies suck, every single time I’ve seen a review of a module based on a review copy and then bought the thing, it was absolutely and utterly disappointing. Because all a review copy is is the author/company bribing a reviewer to make a free add. “You better be good big boy, and sell this. Else you might find yourself paying for this garbage like the rest of the slop hogs.”
Honestly, it’s a talent being this dense. You must have worked hard huffing all that lead as a child.
On the contrary, you are quite clearly someone who asks to be convinced while plugging your ears.
Bryce owes you nothing.
Have you not read this very thread? My goodness, gentle summer child, I spoon-fed it to you, page by page.
There is nothing in this adventure to do, except listen to *lengthy* descriptions of each hovel’s farm tool collection.
If the players finally tire of this and continue outside of the village, they aresummarily laid to waste by monsters not only completely and utterly out of their level range, but which are never surprised and attack as part of the Read-Aloud.
Wait, you had your PCs haggle over the price of cheese, didn’t you. Yeah, that is the literal antithesis of Old School Play and, sadly, no doubt the high point of that game session.
Bryce can howl at the moon all he wants about how to make a good module (based on HIS view of a good module) that doesn’t mean HIS view is the ONLY view of a module whether its mine or somebody elses. Same rules apply to my work and modules as well. I’ll work on stamping out the typos, stat issues, grammar here and their on my stuff going forward, but the bottom line reality is people support my modules, characters, detailed stories and books because they enjoy playing them.
As for this critique:
“The village. The dungeons. All trash. Second person. Too long read-aloud. Too long DM text. Bolding EVERYWHERE to the point it actually causes more confusion than not using it. Boring ass dungeon full of stabbing things and a few traps. “Use DMs discretion” advice everywhere. ”
Take the review, kid. It is what it is. Either shrug it off or let it live rent-free in your mind forever. No one owes you anything.
I can’t post my long response I keep getting this:
Error 406 – Not Acceptable
Generally a 406 error is caused because a request has been blocked by Mod Security. If you believe that your request has been blocked by mistake please contact the web site owner.
I guess Bryce has had enough and blocked me. Winner winner chicken dinner! 😉
That’s just troll-talk, son. Not that anyone here thought you were anything more.
I’m not sure which are worse, the pro-Bryce trolls or the pro-Mark trolls.
I wish they’d both just STFU.
Civilization, mr. Anon, comes at a cost to soul and spirit.
We shall not have this hallowed comment section be defiled by boomers, rules-lite furries, grifters, assorted sycophants and the mentally ill.
For this we pay the Troll Toll.
Well, I can assure you the comments section has been thoroughly defiled. From what I can ascertain there are only two types of people who post on this blog regularly:
1) The mentally ill
2) Authors who are ass-kissing so as to try to avoid receiving one of these bombshell reviews themselves
And note, being #2 does not automatically preclude one from also being #1.
Enjoy your blog, I won’t defile it further myself. In the words of the esteemed Bryce Lynch, “There’s nothing here”.
Yes, but recall the famous Cyclopean orator Penius Harrius’ most treasured wisdom: Semper Ubi Sub Ubi.
Thus do we maintain the Law of Meta-Bryceopolis.
Douché!
Everything Bryce says is objectively correct. Including the spelling errors.
Are you there God? It’s me… I’ll work on stamping out the spelling, typos, stat issues, and grammar stuff going forward, however the rest of his “feedback” is just nit picks and his personal opinions. e.g. “Too long read-aloud. Too long DM text.” Summarize it then for your Players.
Clickety-click-clickety-click
I feel that Dark Wizard Games & its supporters have really shown some poor form here and the community should do its most to ensure they don’t get any support at all (until they can at least publish a decent adventure). Publishing something means that you have to be prepared for criticism whether you like it or not, show some grace and humility. If you don’t agree with the feedback, address the issues in the review you don’t agree with, rather than chucking a tantrum and sending your pals to go and attack the reviewer.
Bryce’s reviews may not be of benefit to everyone, but he generally sticks to his standards, even if I personally am looking for something else in an adventure than what he prioritises.
This is probably the worst look we’ve ever seen from an author and his friends.
No we don’t do cancellation here either fuck you freakshow.
Grace and Humility reviews maybe?
“This thing can go fuck itself. Fifteen fucking dollars. Fuck you man. Fuck You. Dark Wizard Games needs to get a lot smarter a lot faster. Fucking garbage through and through, that’s what this is. A complete insult to every other adventure ever written, the last fifteen years of the internet, and every bit of common sense that should be available to even the most casual fan of Dungeons and Dragons. I hope I die before I wake. Why not just pirate the fucking thing since it’s going to be garbage anyway. Sure, tell yourself you’ll pay for it if its good, whatever gets you through the night.”
– Bryce a.k.a Grace and Humility Review Responses Please….
To be honest, I think I’m going to pop this in my next village and see how the PCs react:
“The residence is surrounded by a small vegetable herb garden with a few brown, black and yellow feathered chickens pecking at the ground nearby. One of the yellow chickens awkwardly stops moving around and stares at you then proceeds to get nervous and well, you know… better watch your step over there! It starts clucking and pecking the ground again then walks away from you.”
This will freak my players out in some way, but I’m not sure of how. But I’m certain they’ll suspect the chicken is a polymorphed dude or demon, or something. It’s an awkward and nervous chicken that stares at you!! Who the hell knows what my PCs will think, but I’m going to see what happens when I throw that out there, it’s the strangest paragraph/situation I think I’ve ever seen in a published module. I see potential.
Yes please do! LOL let your players have some fun with this as it’s meant to be a funny situation they would not get in a regular adventure. The chicken saw the party, got nervous and went to the toilet. If you have ever been around people that raise chickens in real life this is what happens all the time. You have to constantly watch your step!
Reason:
I can’t respond inline, so I’ll have to do so here. Thanks for taking the time to summarize the content of the review. I wish the review had been presented so clearly.
The book appears to be written for people like me who lack the time to prepare for running games. I just don’t have the time, but that’s not an issue when I can buy a book like this; it takes care of the details for me. As a result, information about the village is useful. The railroaded encounters are fine, same with the extensive read aloud and use of second person. I can survive some extra bolding and lack of interactivity. If anything, all of these things simplify the game for new players.
This is a good book for a quick pick up game where you can relive some great memories with friends.
Congratulations you guys. I feel like I’m surrounded by English majors who are very good at writing – all the cussing and personal attacks are uncalled for though.
The reason we didn’t like you is that you presented yourself in a duplicitous and disingenuous manner. Its totally legitimate to like something and disagree with Bryce, we do that too. He has Bested a bunch of absolute dogs and sneered at what some people consider to be great or at least fun work because he ran out of toilet paper midway through the review.
My tip for you would be to, should you choose to visit these environs again, be more direct. You came here not agreeing with the content of the review. That’s good. Make the argument for it right? Defend your way of playing the game. But do not asume this pose where you are an impartial 3rd party observer merely seeking to improve bryce’s review standards or whatever. That’s passive aggressive nonsense, and it fools no one.
You don’t seem like a bad person or anything so as far as I am concerned you are good to go and there’s no bad blood. Late 1e style railroad encounters are not my cuppa, I like my adventuring more open, but clearly there is an audience for it.
Mark, I skimmed through the whole adventure (thank you for the copy) and read Gnarly Bones’ criticism. I fully agree with it.
I love L1 because it plays phenomenally at the table, both as a starting village of a campaign and micro-setting. Village on the Borderlands seems to try to do that but could do better more closely imitating L1.
I also used L4 in the same campaign, but it was detailed to the point of being unwieldy. Village on the Borderlands is in L4 territory, but without the feeling you get with Len Lakofka’s modules that a group actually played through them.
Two more specific criticism:
– 2d6 ogres as wandering monsters for a level 1-3 characters. Oh my!
– Oakenshield is a dwarvish name.
It’s threads like these that keep us coming back, day after day. Good work boys.
Rather late to the game here, but I found that reviewing this one gave me a lot to say. My own thoughts, going section by section and in-depth with specific examples and constructive criticism, is below.
https://espharel.blogspot.com/2024/06/village-on-borderlands-review-cmon-man.html
This is an impressive effort. Everyone should check it out.
Thanks everyone and Byzantine for the detailed feedback. I will work on improving the grammar, stats and technical issues on this (FYI all the testers and proofreader[s] did mention a lot of the technical / stat / grammar issues but I just was not able to get them all addressed in time) and future modules (I am almost done with the latest two that are going to print this week) and already have the next five in development and writing etc. I am sure we could have similar detailed analysis / criticism breakdowns of any one of the old 1980s yellow stripe modules if we apply the same rigid criteria as done here or Bryce’s forum for encounter by encounter or sentence by sentence etc. Also some of the critique is subjective, e.g. “too much boxed text” or “not enough NPC details” – well I expected the DM to paraphrase if its too much and some DMs like having the extra info or flesh out the NPCs beyond their names and physical looks. The detailed main stories, main character backstories, concepts, humor and style is what my fans like that support my work so that style and stuff will remain. I did not include paragraphs in the Borderlands as I simply had to much text to put in the book. It was 64 pages and almost 75,000 words. I wrote and produced the whole project (artwork, maps and printing) in a short span of 3 months from concept to physical book shipments. Also the excessive bolded text in the village cottages was meant to be read aloud to the PCs if needed without have to make a new boxed text area etc. Also if anyone here ever makes their own modules for commercial publication I am always here to give advice or tips on that part of module development. Thanks again I appreciate the feedback and have a great week!
Hi Mark, congratulations on publishing something. It’s a difficult thing to put yourself out there.
I am concerned that you are taking away the wrong lessons from this encounter. If you’re giving these reviewers an honest read, they aren’t subjectively asking you to remove character back stories or details. In fact I’ve read it repeated several times that your characters lack details!
The objection is to mundanity- to cliche. None of these characters have anything going on, no place in the world no agenda to pursue. We’re swimming in words but none of them are relevant to the overall adventure at hand or the players agency.
You say you simply had too much text to organize it correctly, so your solution was to provide your paying customers with an unwieldy product.
I suggest you extend your three month production schedule for your next projects. Use the extra time to cut the text no DM will ever use at the table. No doubt the three pages you’ll have left will be easier to organize.