Gravestone Deep

By Cryptic Keyway
Self Published
B/X
Level 3

This is an entry in my Wavestone Keep adventure design contest. Which I held to combat the crushing ennui I feel when reviewing too many bad adventures in a row. The challenge was to write and short adventure, eight pages, inspired by the concept and marketing tagline of the Wavestone Keep adventure. Now, to combat my crushing boredom, and the perfectionism which prevents me from working on larger projects, I’m going to review the entries!

Be scared of the water, the current and the ocean too! A frightening tall building of hard material moves around the seas, disgorging its killer shipment of reptilian reprobates wherever it chances to beach itself!

This nine page adventure details a tower with about ten or so locations. It’s got a great format, good interactivity, and great writing and creativity. An excellent example of what you can do in a short amount of time if you actually give a fuck. 

I was gonna trash this things marketing blurb as being lame … but then I saw it included the word reprobate, and since my own D&Dmine if Ruffians & Reprobates, well, clearly, this thing deserves high marks!

What we have here is a great effort, someone who is close to graduating from journeyman to master in adventure writing. The basics here are the same as most of the other adventures in the contest: a tower appears at sea and has reptilian raiders in it. In this one the raiders don’t come ashore but rather its hooked out that the party is raiding the tower. 

The first sign that this adventure was going to be above average was in its first hook: “Weird local fisherman Lucien Halibut has offered 20 prize salted mackerel as reward for anyone who can drive out the occupiers of the mysterious keep that appeared last night at the edge of the sea. These aren’t ordinary mackerel, they’re quite valuable. Seriously, do this, Lucien mentioned you by name and may come looking for you if you don’t. You don’t want that.” Specific. Slightly farcical. Something  you know how to run and fill the rest in on our own, and do a good job, just from the couple of sentences mentioned. Another has graffiti appearing on walls and “Find an answer in the creepy tower that appeared that same night, before demographic paranoia broadens to include the PCs’ generation.” Not the best, but, I appreciate the snark and I AM inspired to run a paranoia thing from it, which is the point of a hook. 

Continuing on, the descriptive details here is good. It’s specific aand imaginative. The exterior walls of the tower are constructed from old gravestones, with weathered writing on it and covered by graffiti. Also, bonus, easy to climb because of it. Yeah! I love it when the designer doesn’t gang up on the PC’s. Gravestone walls SHOULD be easy to climb,so they are! Right after that we get a little note about the party seeing a tiny dingy out at sea … with a vengeful fisherman in it armed with a harpoon and grimly singing sea shanties. Fuck yea! I can run that! That’s what specificty gets you. Your mind races. You know what to do. And this adventure does that! I can go on and on. Most of the adventure has something you can easily riff on in most locations.

The format is good. We start rooms with three or four olded words, describing a general vibe, like “metal grate floor, ammonia smell, sound of snapping bones.” Thats the basics of the room. Then you get a short room description of a couple of sentences, then some bolded words for major paragraph headings to orient the DM to whats contained in those paragraphs. The writing is focused. It’s easy to scan. It does exactly what it should do. There’s a monster reference sheet, all of the creatures on one page in the back. The maps are clear (using Dungeonscrawl? Looks like maybe an interesting mapper, even though its online only?) They are annotated well. They also don’t have fucking numbers on them, just words, with the corresponding words in the adventure. In this case it’s probably short enough that doesn’t matter, but, I’d still probably just number the fucking thing. 

I note, also, that the designer has used the EXIT section of each room in an interesting way. I usually rail against such things as being redundant (with the map) and just taking up space and padding things ou t. In this case they have used the exits section of each room to describe sensory information for the various exits. You hear laughter behind this door, or you smell cooking beyond this one, and so on. I can get behind that. Other interesting things include a 2-axis wandering monster table with a preview, the monster encounter, and teh aftermath of the monster appearing on the table. Nice touch and brings the extra element I’m looking for in wanderers. And, it really takes up almost no more space than a traditional table.

It’s hard to get across just how well this thing is done in the creativity department/specificity department. Easy to run NPC’s. Unique treasure and magic items. It’s all in here and all will create memorable play without it being overtly PUSHED to do so. It’s walking that line very well indeed.

I note an interesting thing while going over this: the one time magic item. What do you do with these in your game? A longsword with a one time use smoke bomb in the hilt, or a bottle of whiskey thatinduces vomiting … the ensuing vomit instantly hardening like a web spell. These sem, to me, like things that are to use in game in practice. How do you figure out what to do without voiding the magic items usefulness or communicate the effect in such a way it can be leveraged? Otherwise you’re just moria-gulping potions at random when you’re out food and hoping something good happens.

Also, you could have done more with the cover crone. Just saying. And rando sentry mentions that are out of place in that first room, the foyer.

This thing shows what you can do with a “basic” adventure. There’s no crazy gimmicks. There’s no real gonzo. It’s just your “normal” adventure. But it’s a WELL DONE normal adventure. Gonzo gimmicks may hypnotize, sparkle someone else’s eyes.

Snag a copy here:

https://cryptickeyway.itch.io/gravestone-deep

Posted in Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, Level 3, Reviews, The Best | 14 Comments

The Floating Tower from Atlantis

That’s just some rando meme I pulled down for the blog image, it doesn’t belong to the adventure.

By D.M. Ritzlin
Self Published
B/X
Levels 1-3

This is an entry in my Wavestone Keep adventure design contest. Which I held to combat the crushing ennui I feel when reviewing too many bad adventures in a row. The challenge was to write and short adventure, eight pages, inspired by the concept and marketing tagline of the Wavestone Keep adventure. Now, to combat my crushing boredom, and the perfectionism which prevents me from working on larger projects, I’m going to review the entries!

When Atlantis began to sink, the wizard Oulvert invoked powerful magics to teleport his tower to a place of safety elsewhere on Earth. However, inaccuracies in the spellcasting combined with the destructive energies of the cataclysm resulted in an unforeseeable conjuncture. The three topmost levels of the tower were swept away on the tides of Chaos, and Oulvert found his home floating on the desolate seas of another dimension. As the years went by, the hands of Fate continued to pluck the tower from one world and deposit it in another, always placing it on a large body of water far from land. Now Oulvert’s tower has appeared in your campaign world…

What we’ve got here is a nine room wizards tower bobbing up and down on the ocean like a cork. It’s got decent focus and interactivity, and while the writing is not overly evocative it also is not generic either. A decent little wizard tower with the de rigeur wizard tower twists.

THis is a bare bones wizards tower, ruined, of course. The conceit is that the top five floors have broken off from the rest and bob, like a cork, up and down in the ocean, mostly upright, and then teleport from world to world sometimes. Thus we have some small opportunities to take advantage of the ocean, and the ruined lower levels/flooding, as well as a “everyone to the right side of the room!” mechanic to get it to lean … although that’s really nothing more than what I just mentioned I still like it and it could have been used more. While it shows up to, perhaps, open a secret door, another usage of it could have been cool also.

Wizard Tower means Fantastic Tower, which means Interactivity Tower. That’s what the trope is: it’s a fucked up place and you mess around and find out … and maybe get some treasure. We’ve got a stairwell on the lower floor that leads to the ocean underneath (spiral, of course …) and some broken floor that also drops off in to the watery deep. Fruit trees for eating shit, and scrying chambers to fuck around in (which, also, nice note, allow you to take the 1’ diameter giant scrying eyeball with you! I’m happy to see this. Of course, you also have to hit it up with forty drops of blood a day ala eye drops, but, hey man, you’re the one with the one foot diameter scrying eyeball. Think of it like changing your oil.) We’ve got the alchemists lab, of course, with a potion to drink … that has a gelatinous cube in it. Ouchies for the poor sucker who drinks that one! So, about one interactive element, of one sort or another beyond mere combat, in each room. It doesn’t FEEL like the designer is putting one in each room, it feels more natural than that and I adore adventures that FEEL right.

Formatting is decent. It’s basic two column, with mini-maps of the rooms appearing in the adventure in appropriate places. Bullets help keep major room concepts separate and the general format is that the most important/obvious things appear first. So, in the first room of the tower the broken windows are mentioned, sinc ethats what the ;ayers are likely to encounter first from the outside. Then the flooding, then the books floating in the flooded water and so forth. You get it. It’s done well. A bit of bolding might have helped a bit, there is a bit of a wall of text thing no matter the bullet format, or, perhaps, some more white space. There’s also a kind of “run on” with one room sometimes flowing in the next because of a need for whitespace to help separate it. It’s hard to describe … it’s not always a “read the entire column” thing but rather a “go to column two to finish the room and then back to column one again for the next room” kind of thing.

We are a little wordy in the descriptions, in places, and a little shy with the descriptions. “However, if opened without the use of a key …” is a bit conversational in tone. Certainly I wouldn’t expect a purely mechanistic description, with the joy of language in it or those snide DM asides that I love so much, but a little more focus on the editing could have helped. Then again, there was a short deadline in this contest. Likewise the descriptions are a little light in place, or, I mean, the descriptive phrases and adjectives. Our wanderersa re “orney lizardmen” or “inquisitive locath”, which, while better than nothing on a wanderer table, could use a little beefing up with an extra word or two, maybe. This sort of minimal approach is better than nothing, but really could use a little more work, in the room description in particular, to beef things up to the next level. “Murals were painted on the walls, but are not covered in so much reeking mold as to be illegible” Not bad. Not great, but not bad. Nice reeking. 

So, decent little concept and adventure, better than most wizard towers, but not quite reaching the heights I would like. (The correct response to this is: “Fuck You Bryce, you gave me a week to fucking write it!”)

You can snag a copy here for download:

Posted in Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, No Regerts | 11 Comments

SinkingStone Keep

By Eric Johnson
Self Published
AD&D 1e
Levels 1-4

This is an entry in my Wavestone Keep adventure design contest. Which I held to combat the crushing ennui I feel when reviewing too many bad adventures in a row. The challenge was to write and short adventure, eight pages, inspired by the concept and marketing tagline of the Wavestone Keep adventure. Now, to combat my crushing boredom, and the perfectionism which prevents me from working on larger projects, I’m going to review the entries!

Fear stalks the swamps! The ruins of SinkingStone Keep has thrown its lizard like shadow over the village of Soggy Bottom. Can you and your fellow adventurers root out this festering evil and destroy it? Beware, many who enter the swamp are never seen or heard from again!

This eleven page adventure details a lizard man lair with about ten locations, but a swampy village and brief overland. It’s a true blu AD&D adventure, with the attention to detail. Writing is effective at times, especially in the village and overland, but falls down in the lair proper. The lair is also pretty much one big hack/frontal assault. I would prefer more, but, for what it is is it’s pretty decent.

So, This is an AD&D adventure. What’s an AD&D adventure? Well, I’m going to say True to the Rules. Meaning that it mentions, and takes advantage of, the actual rules in the book. Straight up front it’s got a section on Morale. And then a brief note on movement rate through a swamp, and then Quicksand rules from the Wilderness Survival Guide. Following that is Holding your Breathe rules and something on Swamp Conditions from WG6 that details your shit (mostly food) rotting in the swamp. (That section strikes me as a bit lengthy. It’s not completely the onerous shit about desert/swamp/snow that I usually rail against, too rules heavy, but, also, it goes on a little long. I might say that it coverers longtimeframes, like metal starting to decay after two weeks, but, then again, A&D players camp out to heal to a rotting table that include a 2% chance of rotting every ten days might be ok. I pity the DM that actually calls for these checks from their players though …) 

But, that’s not all! Oh no, we’ve got some AD&D flavour here! First, this is going to be more of a B2 style adventure. You’re gonna go in to the ruins, hopefully take some lizardmen by surprise, and then eventually blow your cover and face an onslaught of twenty of them in a phalanx formation. You sneak until discovered. After that they form ranks, and, if you return, replace some flosses and are on high alert, having set some traps. AD&D detail at its finest! We’ve also got some nice town detail … with ethe villagers in the nearby swamp town being worshippers of Wastri … and ready to gak the demi-humans in the party when they return and feed them to their toads. (Or, maybe, they just do it anyway. The intro says demi-humans while the conclusion section basically says they double-cross the party at a feast no matter what. Meh. Less interesting that way. Or, maybe it’s just assuming all parties have demi-humans?) 

I’m pretty happy with the intro also. A couple of paragraphs that mentions, a highlight, a low level war between the lizard men and the villagers. The lizardmen raid caravans and burn supplies, but let the people go. I imagine that the villagers hunt the lizardmen and do lizardmen on pikes out front, burned at the stake, etc. Some hateful villager shit. 

The village is terse described, the six or so buildings, but it does a decent job. The trading post is a good example of an entry “This is the social center of the village. At different times it can be a flurry of chaotic trading or completely empty and quiet. The place is empty save for tables spread throughout. Old Bert runs the place and will run the party off unless they participate in the aggressive barter. “Not worth spit!””  I can imagine the place, and the dialog line from Bert, which all of the NPCs get, is a decent little thing that tells you how to run them. Good job, about the right amount of detail!

The overland travel is a decent part of this, but just handled through the overland hex maps and the wanderers table. About half or so get little entries, like goblins “ They will demand that the party pay a toll for being in their swamp.” or some such. It’s mostly the dumb animals that are just entries. 

Once you hit the keep where the lizardmen are then it devolves. Basically, there are watchposts. If they get away to warn the inside, in the basement, then it’s gonna get a pitched battle. And since there are about three watchposts upstairs, it’s hard to imagine that not happening. Also, with the close environs of the basement, and it being dark, torches and combat are gonna alert the place fast. So, pitched fight. Hope you got a lot of sleep spells. I’m not the biggest fans of those, I think they are a pain to run in D&D, but, it happens and I recognize its an important part of the game. 

Descriptions inside the “dungeon” (a very small eight room cave) start to fall down a lot. “Area is lit by torches. 4 guards are posted here.” “A crocodile is cooking on a spit. It is being tended to by 5 females.” Nice croc detail, but little else. The stairs creaking as you descend to the dungeon is the closest you get to something truly evocative, I think.

It’s relatively terse and, I would say, outline writing. No, not really an outline, but, tending toward that style, much in the way B2 is. You get the requirements to run the room, and maybe an evocative keyword here and there. In fact, I think the B2 style is the closest to the style here. Imagine the kobold cave writing style. That’s what you get here.

Yeah, it’s eleven pages and the contest says nine, I think? But, there’s a cover and a license page, so, nine pages of content, plus, I like having a cover to post on the blog. 🙂

I suspect that the AD&D true fans will like this. It’s a little abstracted for my tastes, but, I recognize the style and that the true AD&D crowd leans that way. It’s hard to suggest more room detail/evocative writing when it’s just gonna be a pitched battle, because of the close confines of the cavern rooms. It FEELS like the adventure, including the town, wandereing/hex, and keep, are minor parts of the adventure though, with the supporting info being the majority of the page count. Fourish pages for the overland and keep and village? What about the other five (seven.) I get it, maps, but still, it feels a little like the supporting info is taking over.

I’m left both liking this, for what it is, and being unsettled by it, because of the strong AD&D style, which is not my fav. When the B/X person is confronted by the true AD&D 1e adventure, they are left a bit bewildered. 🙂 I’d be interested in the opinions of the hard core AD&D 1e crowd. Not you lightweights actually playing 1e as B/X, but the true 1e fanatics who can appreciate a Wastri reference.

(Also, the map numbers are a little difficult to read on the full colour maps. They needed to be in an inset circle with a white background or something, to be easier to read.)

Pick it up for free over at the designers dropbox! (The designer who, I note, lives relatively close to me and yet still hasn’t gone drinking with me yet!)

https://www.dropbox.com/s/34tgq41rjab5r5x/TFP1%20SinkingStone%20Keep.pdf?dl=0

Posted in Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, Reviews | 13 Comments

What Lurks Beneath Tidewater Tower

By Jordan Rudd
Self-published
5e
level 3

This is an entry in my Wavestone Keep adventure design contest. Which I held to combat the crushing ennui I feel when reviewing too many bad adventures in a row. The challenge was to write and short adventure, eight pages, inspired by the concept and marketing tagline of the Wavestone Keep adventure. Now, to combat my crushing boredom, and the perfectionism which prevents me from working on larger projects, I’m going to review the entries!

Despite its benign appearance, Tidewatch Tower has an interesting history. A few months ago it served as the hideout for a group of unscrupulous seafaring adventurers led by a rogue named Mad Karli. After a particularly lucrative and dangerous outing they hid their  booty in the caverns under the tower. Mad Karli then betrayed, poisoned and murdered what remained of her crew. Unfortunately this was the same day that the sea harpies decided to move in and she was drowned and eaten in short order, her remains cast into the sea

Hmmm, I do seem to be stumbling on a lot of sea keep adventures lately … weird. 

This nine page adventure details around nine locations in and under a tower on a small rock surrounded by the tides. It’s got some good specificity in places and keeps things relatively terse, especially for a 5e adventure. And doubly especially for the first adventure the designer has written. A little more attention to bolding and a few other details would help shift in to a journeyman effort.

I was struck by the ludcriness of the background, in a good way. The background is something that only the DM is going to see and seldom influences play. But … not seen in this is the second paragraph about mermen hiding a cursed idol in the tower. Following this through, I can see chaining together about twelve other misfortunes, in a Rube Goldberg kind of way, for the DM background. I know I harp about tersity all the time, but, I also appreciate a little side eye to the DM running the thing, and sly remarks in the adventure … to an appropriate degree. A paragraph to lighten the DMs day, pushing this, struck me as a cool little thing. But … I digress.

We’ve got a little rumor section up front, with three rumors. They are trying to be in voice, and in fact are, which I appreciate. The added color is good when the rumors do this. They are also a little direct. Let’s imagine three different style of rumors. “Pirates hide treasure in the tower.” This might be the more traditional, a minimalist approach. Then, the one from this adventure “I heard that ol’ scoundrel Mad Karli hid her treasure in the tower. Her crew aint been seen on these shores in months, but some other strangers have been asking after her.” We’ve got extra specificity and some in voice going on. This is great, let’s call this the minimum acceptable level. But, again, it’s a little direct. The pirate hid treasure in the tower. I’m suggesting that you want to IMPLY that, but not SAY that. 

Our adventure starts outside, on the causeway leading to the tower. Covered during high tides and waist high water during low tide. And two sea harpies looking for folk to munch on while they wade out. The waist-high water is a good detail, and it notes that there IS a movement reduction, but not what it is. A cross-reference to a rule book page would have been nice ,or a footnote or paren comment or some such reading (half movement) or whatever it is. Also, the fucking things run away to their nest on the tower when heavily damaged. Great! We’ve got smarties to fight! The terse but interesting causeway details, the sea harpy attack, the naturalistic difficult terrain … all great and don’t SEEM like the pretext they are. It feels right, as opposed to a lot of 5e where this sort of thing feels contrived in a wargamey way. 

There’s some good specificity in this adventure, tossed in. One harpy wields a rusty cutlass while another wears a jaunty tricorn hat. Hmmm, that’s weird, but makes sense given they killed Mard Karli. A necklace of fireballs is made up of glass globes with swirling red glittering inside. And pirate dudes have love letters with bad spelling. So, both an occasional light-heartedness and specificity. 

There’s some creativity beyond the specificity also. A fetish/necklace of a fishhook is a minor magc item giving you advantage on catching fish/survival checks. I like the more naturalistic manor of this (being a big fan of the minor magic items in Bree and the barrow Downs as a child.) There may be a bit of video-gamey element to this, as one takes off and wear various fetishes, but, still, it’s coming from the right place. 

And, there a natural way of dealing with the short=rest/long-rest issue. You get one short for free, but after that you get some extra pirates showing up! The ones mentioned in the rumor, her boyfriend, who wants answers as to why shes missing … from you! That’s a great control on the long-rest situation. At least the first one anyway. But, also, this is what would happen. You’d just slowly fuck that place up, resting as you need to. Such is life when the dungeon is close to town, although … perhaps others are looting also? Maybe that’s a control on the frequent rest issue, beyond the wanderers? Anyway …

Good descriptions, decent magic items … what’s lacking here? There is about three pages of monster stats … an issue that is hard to handle. How much in the way of stat blocks do yo include vs forcing people to reference something else? With almost three pages you could do A LOT with an adventure, and yet, no stat blocks would be a pain in the ass also. Such is the life of a 5e designer, I guess. 

There’s also a bit of cumbersome work in the formatting, the descriptions, and the core interactivity. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not BAD, at all. In fact, compared to the usual 5e garbage this is a masterpiece, but, OUR tenfootpole is made of stronger stuff. The interactivity is a bit light, beyond the usual sort, A little roleplay with the pirates that show up and some fights that are a little set-piecy. There … methodology? Of the rooms, or, the formatting and descriptive style, is what I think I’m noting. It’s not bad, but it does show a certain degree of … clumsy? Lack of focus? Neither of those … inexperience, maybe? It’s not the usual padding or overwritten, but, perhaps, a lack of emphasis on certain areas and a focus on others … not necessarily tangential to the adventure. And while the descriptions are better than average, a little work on that could be useful also. “Four bedrolls are on the ground – three are occupied by corpses. They are clothed in tatter and the flesh has nearly been picked clean by the dozens of decayed algae-covered crabs laying on and around them” The second half picks up steam, with the crabs, but the corpses is a light description, as are the bedrolls and clothes. Further, I would suggest the crabs, rotten and legs up, or some such would also serve this description well. 

So, ok, but not a home run. 

You can snag a copy here:

Posted in 5e, Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, No Regerts, Reviews | 4 Comments

Rolling Deep Keep

By John Turcotte
Self Published
B/X
Levels 1-3

This is an entry in my Wavestone Keep adventure design contest. Which I held to combat the crushing ennui I feel when reviewing too many bad adventures in a row. The challenge was to write and short adventure, eight pages, inspired by the concept and marketing tagline of the Wavestone Keep adventure. Now, to combat my crushing boredom, and the perfectionism which prevents me from working on larger projects, I’m going to review the entries!

The night is dark and stormy. Terrified riders have arrived from the south, gasping desperate warnings from foaming lips. A dreadful stone tower roams up the coast, somehow riding the waves, disgorging swarms of ravenous lizardmen at every seaside town. Fear the tide, fear the tide!

This eight page/nine-ish room adventure describes … a keep on the back of a dragon turtle and its lizardmen raiders! It’s going for a kind of weird vision of the sea, and succeeds, at times, in conjuring that otherworldly vision. It’s also quite wordy, which makes the rooms cumbersome to run at times, stuffed as they are with detail. Still, it’s not padded.

Oh no! The raiders are coming! The party is in town and has the night to prepare for the raid. I love the adventures that let you prep for a big raid ,defending and building fortifications and rallying the local populace. This doesn’t quite do that … the town proper is not mentioned and the prep is mostly, I think, the party resting and memorizing, etc. At least, that seems to be the way things are written with little guidance on little else in this section. Still, good idea! And, there IS guidance for how to run the party if they intercept the island keep before it hits town proper. If they row out to intercept it, wait for the raiders to disgorge, or wait in town or hit them as they enter the harbour. Nice touch. It goes on a little bit long, I think, or, maybe, it feels like it does because of the difference scenarios it runs through. And, you DO get guidance on recruiting some local fisherfolk, etc. (I could have misread this, but it felt like it was rallying them during the raid rather than the night before,) So, decent job here. A little long, but the core concept is a strong one. 

The outpost proper gets a nice little map, with around nine rooms on four or five levels, and cool little side video also. It’s a decent map, with crumbly walls and open gaps for the clever party to exploit. Plus, it all drawn with a turtle underneath … I’m a simple man; all I want in life is a pencil drawing of a turtle underneath a keep. 🙂

The environment is a bit weird, in an “under the sea” kind of way. I’ve been quite disappointed in the past with the ability of adventures to conjure the vision of a truly weird under the sea vision. Something like the (City of Rapture?) from Bioshock, or the visions you paint in your mind of R’yleh. Here it’s done to decent effect. Corals and barnacles, uncanny blueish wood (I shall excuse the word uncanny here as an abstraction) and venomous serpent heads. Tranmogrified lizardmen and crumbling coral stairs zigzagging. Ivory cameos, torn, soiled and spoiled garments in a heap, a dazzling mosaic of varicoloured abalone shells. Pictographs of men with nautilus heads. This hit me hard with a ceiling above featuring a bas-relief face grimacing down, cracked and damaged, a face no longer discerned but for huge empty oval eyes, haunting, and what may be a mustache … or tentacles around a contoured mouth. Spooky shit to have the ceiling above you! And, of course, a quilt of wooly fog pushed before the keep proper, as it appears, looming impossibly over the waves. Nice imagery in all of that, and more to boot! Great use of evocative writing if, I think, a little abstracted at times. (And Bryce don’t like the words large and huge, generally, as the come off a bit generic.)

My primary issue with this is the density of the rooms. They generally get a couple of paragraphs and some of the later rooms stretch onwards to nearly a column or more or relatively dense paragraphs. The bolding used generally identified creatures (good) but the formatting for the rest if generally not present. This tends to make my eyes glaze over. This isn’t exactly wall of text, and the text is certainly not padded out with empty phrases and the like. The rooms are just DENSE and the writing used, overloading all of the objkects in the room, becomes quite a bit to handle. A section of scroll cases is one of the shortest paragraphs, and reads “Dozens upon dozens of cracked and ruined scroll-cases are still here, their contents ruined. At the DM’s discretion, a treasure map or clue  to a future scenario can be found here.” There’s nothing really wrong with this. It’s doing things right. And yet, when the rooms are packed, and each thing in it tends to get this treatment, it becomes a bit troublesome to dig through. The details, also, the major details, are scattered throughout the text, making the initial room grok a bit hard since you’re digging through everything. 

I’m at a loss, really, to understand what to do about it. Usually fixes are easy. In this case though the overloading of words and depth ande detail tend to contribute to that otherworldly under the sea vibe that I enjoy so much. Maybe an intro paragraph, detailing a room overview, with bolding to draw the eye to the keywords of the followup sections? That is some common advice of mine, but it feels somehow wrong in this case. I don’t know. It tasks me!

A fine adventure! A good “sunken island risen” thing going on, along with decent raid details. I just wish I could grok it more easily.

Snag a copy here!

Posted in Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, No Regerts | 9 Comments

The Keep of Dragon Turtle Greth

By J Blasso-gieseke
21st Century Games
OSE
Level 2?

Fear the tides! For upon the ocean’s black abyss rides a keep of stone on the broad shelled back of the mighty dragon turtle Greth.

Fear the tides! For unbeknownst to the fisher families of Stonewave the tides have turned against them.

Fear the tides! For this night, the vast body of Greth will beach itself upon the shore and a score of Iguanamen will be disgorged to raid the town for fresh human flesh.

Can the party fight off the Iguanamen raid in the night? Can the party reach Greth in time to rescue the captives before he dives into the deep?

This is an entry in my Wavestone Keep adventure design contest. Which I held to combat the crushing ennui I feel when reviewing too many bad adventures in a row. The challenge was to write and short adventure, eight pages, inspired by the concept and marketing tagline of the Wavestone Keep adventure. Now, to combat my crushing boredom, and the perfectionism which prevents me from working on larger projects, I’m going to review the entries!

This eight page adventure details about thirteen locations, including a keep with nine rooms. It’s got some wonderful use of language, good treasure, and a fun “raid” mentality with a cool little mechanic. I’m a fan!

Generic vs Vanilla comes up all the time. Generic is bad but vanilla can be delicious! This adventure features two classic tropes that, finally(!) are combined in to a delicious vanilla. First, we’ve got the classic Dragon Turtle with a building on its back … with the threat of an impending DIVE! DIVE! DIVE! Second, we’ve got a sea raid by humanoids. Both of these have been to death … or so I might have previously said. As always, the classics are classics for a reason and, when done well they show you why. And this one is done well.

You’re asleep in the inn when shit hits the fan. A nightime raid from the sea by humanoids! They are dragging people off! You see some inside the inn and deal with them, run outside and see a guy standing there saying shit like they just ran off with the Potters kids! You go down to the docks (cause you’re fucking heroes! I usually deride this kind of thing, but, it works here, I think, because of the frantic nature. More on this later.) Ol Yurtle is about to head out to sea and you board him, maybe by rowing out if you were slow, and get on his back to raid the keep to free the people taken hostage. And, maybe, if you were very good little adventurers … find the treasure room before the turtle dives.

Also, this is gonna be one of those gushy reviews where I fanboy out.

Everything in this works perfectly together. The writing is evocative and descriptions terse by favourful. “A bloated corpse bound with iron kelp. 1 iguanaman glutting itself.” Bloated. Glutting. Fuck yes! Not to mention, the use of iguanamen itself father than lizardmen or bullwugs or some shit. Noice! When you run out of the inn for the first time you are greeted with “Johann Sparr, a simple, but powerfully built fisherman in his late-40s, will be standing barefoot on the cobbled street in a soiled night dress and cap wrestling with his conscience to go after the raiders.” That’s fucking perfect. Soiled, wrestling, barefoot on cobbled streets. I can run this entire scene, and, indeed, the rest of him since he’s an NPC that may stick around. Further, he don’t stick around and become troublesome, he can show you the way to the docks so you find them faster and pick the fastest boat to chase the turtle, which is probably out to sea at this point. Then, after reaching the turtle, HE GOES BACK TO GET HELP AND MORE BOATS TO TAKE THE RESCUED PEOPLE BACk!!! A fucking useful NPC! And, it gets rid of him before he becomes an escort mission. And, it makes the fuck sense! Nice!

It’s using a great 2-column landscape formatting to great effect, stuffing the pages full of text, but also using bullets and indents and highlighting/bolding to great effect to make everything pretty easily digestible. Oh! Oh! And you’ve got a little “check off” box for the iguanamen raiders and the hostages … cause some of those fucking people ain’t coming back “On the sea slick floor of the dragon turtle’s shell, 2 Iguanamen are hastily devouring a pair of corpses.” Ought oh! Better mark off two hostages! I love it! Good shaded boxes for monster stats also. 

We also get a Time Unit Tracker. A hidden chart, the DM marks off Time Units based on combats, fucking aruond, if the party has help from the fisherman, etc. It’s fucking tense as shit! Seriously, this is the first time I’ve seen a “race against time!” adventure that actua;ly FEELS tense! “Any time the party desitates, mark a time unit.” Fuck me! Gahhhh! I might put this up on a whiteboard or giant paper behind me and mark them off in BIG letters. It’s also recommending an egg timer, but it’s use is less clear. Anyway, this is great! Eventually the turtle dives, over three time units, giving the party time to escape the flooded keep on its back to, hopefully, the waiting boats. Or the one boat they took!  Fucking tense, I love it!

Treasure is great, including a conch that summons a ghost ship! That’s all there is and that’s all the fuck I need! I havent decided yet if its just a ship, ala folding boat, or like full of undead pirates, ala Horn of Valhalla, but I’ll figure it the fuck out … whch if the fucking way I love my magic items. Mystery! Wonder! Joy! Mundane treasure is good also, with things like a mother-of-pearl gorget. Everything is just a line or two, and the vast vast majority of the treasure is in one room in the keep … and you’ve probably found most of the hostages before then … although you don’t know that … Push your luck at its finest!

Specify is great. The hostages all get names, which should add to the roleplay fun, and the fisherman says something like “Some sort of lizardmen! I seen them carrying off the Potts’s kids!” when he’s encountered outside. That’s fucking great! That’s specificity! That brings the game alive so much more than just generic “they are abducting people!” 

I think I have only one suggestion for this. I might add, up front, that the turtle will dive soon. I don’t think I want to SHOW on the chart, when the turtle dives, that’s too immersive breaking, but, I do think I want the party to KNOW he will dive soon, to add even more tension. Some NPC yelling something about it always diving in an hour or something like that, just to get that across to the party up front as I’m marking time units publicly.

Our designer, here, claims to have just discovered RPG’s in January (a year ago, I think, not two months ago?) and claims to have NEVER played an RPG before. They just read and learn. God, I love them so much. Hey, asshat readers, let’s find out where the designer is and some of you non-sucky people run a game for them!

The designer doesn’t have a site yet, so here’s the adventure, with their permission, for download.

Posted in Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, Level 2, Reviews, The Best | 37 Comments

Guimond’s Light

by Glenn Robinson
Self Published
OSE
Levels 1-2

This ancient tower of stone watches over waves, the tides, and the sea itself! What secrets lie within?

This is an entry in my Wavestone Keep adventure design contest. Which I held to combat the crushing ennui I feel when reviewing too many bad adventures in a row. The challenge was to write and short adventure, eight pages, inspired by the concept and marketing tagline of the Wavestone Keep adventure. Now, to combat my crushing boredom, and the perfectionism which prevents me from working on larger projects, I’m going to review the entries!

This eight page adventure details a nine adventure locations, and a few bonus locations in the surrounding environs. There is this implied plot, or, background, going on in it that I absolutely LUV, and Glenn has certainly mastered the art of writing a sentence that implies much more than it actually says. A great adventure! All the more so for being his “first attempt at putting a dungeon coherently on paper.” 

I don’t even know where the fuck to start this review. I’m excited about this thing and that happens when I’m excited. There’s this tower, an old ruined lighthouse. There are some farmers fields around it. A small beach underneath it with a cave, and a wreck out on the reef. The tower has, like five rooms, or so. The caves like three, and the wreck a few numbered locations. There’s NOTHING to this place, just looking at the numbers. And yet, there is EVERYTHING going on. 

This fucking thing looks good right from the first two paragraphs. The first has this gem: “On stormy nights travellers claim a ghostly light- keeper tends the light. It is also said that the blood-drinking sea fiends will run a ship aground on the jagged section of cliffs known as “the sleeping wyrm’s maw” and devour the survivors. At least, that’s what the locals would have you believe.” Perfect! It sets a mood in the DMs head! It’s got some rumors built the fuck in without there being a rumor table! Not just monsters but sea-fiends! Not just sea-fiends by BLOOD DRINKING sea fiends! And a fucking ghostlly lighthouse keeper to boot! Sounds like my kind of guy!

And para 2 is “The shire has banned visitors to the old tower – in its current state, it is a health and safety nightmare the shire wants no part of, thank you very much!” I can fucking work with that! Busy bodies running around, minor officials, forms and receipts for the receipt of forms delivered! I know everything I need to know about the admin environment from that sentence. I can riff on it endlessly! That’s what the fuck good writing is, more than the words on the page. 

The next section is “geography”, but that’s a mis-label. In most adventures that would be boring ass shit. In this it means “the area right the fuck in front of the tower.” Bracken and saltgrass. The Pilgrim Path road, or Way of Sorrows, or, locally, just The Road. Perfect! Poor framing land surrounding it … which the locals often remark on the farmers prosperity … and the scarecrows … which the farmers cautiously call their “inheritance.” Jesus, I’m almost quoting the entirety of the first page here. But SOOOOO much is in it! 

It’s a fucking scooby doo advenure! The lighthouse with a well-oiled lock on it. Footprints in the dust. Sea caves full of ill gotten loot. A lizardman harpooned to the deck of the ship … with a manacle around his leg! The adventure never spells shit out to you, in black and white, yet SOOO much is implied in the writing. It’s a fucking scooby doo adventure! I love it!

Writing and formatting it excellent. A short and terse little sentence or two. A bloated keyword or two like “clear track” in a duty room, to help draw the DMs eye and assist in scanning. Cross-references are light, but not in a bad way, only used where appropriate. An otherwise empty room reads “Dusty with clear tracks through the dust, both up the stairs and towards the southern door. Filtered daylight, the smell of guano, and a slight breeze from upstairs.” Short. Terse. Each to scan. Evocative writing that paints a picture. Filtered daylight captures a vignette perfectly. A slight breeze, I love it! And room after room after room hits this way. 

Anbd there’s these references, over and over again, to the fucking scarecrows and the fucking farmers! And all the time you’re like “what the fuck is going on here Glenn, why the fuck do you keep mentioning it all Chekov’s Gun like?” And it beautiful how your mind races to fill that shit in, and then, when you reach the end you learn things, finally, by putting all of the bits together in your head. The wanderer table in the tower has “2 farmers trimming wicks” and in the wreck “1d4+1 farmers counting coins!” or “2 frightened lizardmen!” 

Glenn has created a wonderful adventuring environment. It’s not just a location based adventure in a tower. It’s the surrounding lands. It’s the sea save, the wreck, the fields, the implied locale government. He’s not spelling anything out but everything is implied and obvious. DId I mentioned the “Belligerent territorial sheep” on the craggly paths? Wonderful! 

The wanderer table just has monster entries … but with an extra word sometimes that says what needs to be said. “2 pfficious shire OHS officials.” I know the fuck how to run that shit! “Disconcerting flaggelants” I know how to run that shit! Furtive fsarmers fossicking!  Allerative and wonderful! 

Plus! Plus! The little color map of the saves has little crab eyes and claws sticking out of the pool! I love it!

Charming. The words are evocative. The situation described is more than the words on the page explicitly deliver. 

I have but two critical comments. First, the loot is book and boring. 22 gems. Diamond broach. Eyeballof seeing. Gauntlets of ogre power, elven cloak and boots. Meh. They could use a word or two to bring them to life. Second, the hooks suck ass. Your youngest sibling was on a recently wrecked ship. Yawn. No self-respecting adventurer has relatives, so as to keep themselves out of these troubles. Or, you get hired by a cleric to sketch the lighthouse. I might have just left the hooks out, altogether, and used that column for the expanded loot section. 

This is a strong, strong first entry to the contest. I often talk about how constrained a short adventure is. How you really need room to breathe in an adventure to develop things. This thing stands as a counterpoint to my statement. Sure, it’s no megadungeon, or “Real” dungeon level. But, as an isolated tower to go explore, in eight pages? Fuck yeah man! It’s doing as much as it can with the assignment given and IS a real adventure, just a short one. Great work.

Glenn made a DriveThru page just for this contest, but it’s not live yet as I type this. It should be by the time you read it. You can snag it at:

https://www.drivethrurpg.com/product/389715/Guimonds-Light?1892600

Posted in Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, Level 1, Reviews, The Best | 15 Comments

The Weathered Well

By John Gronquist
Hack Shack Games
5e
Level 1

It’s a story as old as time. Boy meets girl. Girl meets abandoned well. Boy chases girl down abandoned well only to find horrors beyond their worst nightmares.. Perhaps those old tales about ‘ol Grim Jack and Granny Hentooth lurking in a world below the water weren’t just silly children’s rhymes after all?

This 68 page adventure has, I don’t know, thirty rooms? In abu=out thirty pages. It’s overwrought and overwritten and the intro is full of shit to justify the shitty shitty choices in the design. A rich Tapestry. Fun for all player types. Bleach!

Look at that! The sun is shining! The birds are singing! I found a bottle of whiskey when I thought I was out! And the last two adventure recommendations from readers have turned out to be decent or better! I’m on a roll! Let’s grab another recommendation from the readership!  

Oh …

It’s fucking trash.

Somehow you end up in a village. They don’t like you or trust you. But, also, they sent you a letter asking you for help? Somehow, in the village, you figure out that you have to get through this wall that surrounds a grove of trees and a well in the center. I guess you learn about the well in the center from someone in the village? It’s not clear; it’s just assumed? And you have some quest to find some missing teens/kids. I think? It’s not really spelled out, again, it’s just kind of assumed. Inside the grove you get the idea to go down the well. Again, I’m not really sure why. I guess you explore the entire grove and figure out the well is the next place? And inside of it you wander through twenty rooms of a temple. And, somehow, from that, you figure out there is a gate room and all these other rooms that require things in them to be placed, obtained from other rooms in the dungeon, to activate the gate. Why do you do this? I don’t know. I guess because you can. And then you enter a six room linear dungeon with a challenge in each room. You find one of the missing people petrified in the last room. 

This thing is just trash.

It’s full of advice. It’s supposed to be a “Dark Ride”, like at an amusement park. IE: a railroad. Monsters don’t spill over in to other rooms, that would ruin the tory. You’re told to fudge die rolls ALL the time for the sake of THE STORY and keeping the players alive. “Don’t be afraid to fudge things to get the ending right!” the advice says, at the ending. Because “how any story ends sets the tone of the memory it leaves on those invested in it …” Ha! Jokes on you! I’m not invested AT ALL in this shit. I’m eye rolling and wishing I had gone drinking tonight instead of playing D&D with friends. THis fucking thing is SOOOOO pretentious. Fuck you and FUck Your Story.The story is the one created by the players through their characters, not the crap the DM attempts to impose on them. Fucking railroady bullshit, it is. At some point, future players will look on this era, this style of adventure design, with the derision it deserves, just as we do today with the 2e/Storyteller era.

Is the read-aloud atrocious? Of course it is! It’s boxed. With a blue background. And every one starts with AS THE PLAYERS ENTER READ:. I get it. It’s fucking boxed text. It’s distracting. And it’s long Very long. Multiple paragraphs long. It is no wonder that players pull out phones as their eyes glaze over while the DM reads this overly long garbage. Overly written garbage, ta that. Overwrought. With lots of “YOU enter a narrow hallway …” and “as YOUR race begins …” Loathsome, overwrought writing. Which overreveals details, destroying the interaction between player and DM that D&D thrives on. But, whatever. This ain’t D&D, right? IT”S A STORY. It’s like those video games that are actually video novels, just push a button to advance to the next cutscene. “With theta llooks like a doorway.” It’s fucking doorway. That’s how the text should be written. *sigh*

And this continues in to the DM text, with paragraph upon paragraph spelling out everything. Columns of creature tactics. No use of bolding or whitespace, bullets, etc to make the thing easier to comprehend. 

It’s a living hell. 

It is all that is wrong with adventures today. Congratulations for reaching the end goal. I only wish you were more popular so as to force more people in to the realization of the emptiness of void within themselves. 

And the rebirth that brings.

And a big shout out of FUCK! YOU! To the person who suggested this was good and recommended it to me. Kickstarter trash. Two ratings, both five stars, of course.

This is $9 at DriveThru. The preview is twelve pages. The last two show a couple of houses in the village surrounding the well. You should be able to tell from those how garbage things will be.

https://www.drivethrurpg.com/product/364705/The-Weathered-Well?1892600

Posted in 5e, Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, Reviews, The Worst EVAR? | 7 Comments

Treasures of the Troll King

By Chris Bissette
Loot the Room
Mork Borg

Galgenbeck is palimpsest. Tumour. A city built on the ruins of itself. Beneath the sewers the bones of the old city fester. The troll-king Niduk was exiled, driven into the depths to rot and die. Now twisted by hatred and rage he oversees the small domain he has carved for himself, in a forgotten chapel to a murdered god. Why are you here? A lost bet? A doomed quest for silver? Boredom? Does it even matter?

Yeah, It’s Mork Borg. Someone told me that this one didn’t suck. They were right.

This 36 page adventure details a sewer point-crawl with around six locations, and then a more traditional dungeoncrawl with around eleven rooms. Good formatting. Evocative writing. Some interactivity beyond stabbing. Creative situations. This one is not bad at all, even with the required Mork Borg “tilt font 23 degrees to the left” formatting that shows up at times. 

The Mork Borgians have a bad rep. I might summarize it as “someone who geeks out over layout and three color art had one conceptual idea for a room in an adventure.” Layout, as a means to facilitating comprehension by the DM, is a good thing. But, the reputation is that layout is pushed too far until IT alone becomes the focus, losing the fact that it is supposed to facilitate DM comprehension of the adventure. Pushed so far that it becomes a detriment to comprehension. And it’s clear that most Morg Borg adventure revolve around one idea, a single concept, and could almost be, or should be, one room dungeons. They don’t try to work toward something longer than two hours.
This adventure ain’t that.

Yeah, there’s some three color art (red, yellow and black, the Mork Borg “we’re PuNk!” staples.) And there’s some formatting nonsense in places, like using roman numerals on a die roll table and tilting the fucking text and varyng the font size, etc, to make a half page “art” die roll table. These are relatively minor though. The art contributes to the adventure vibe in a positive way and I can accept that you gotta throw in that table nonsense or they kick you out of the Mork Borg club. It’s just a couple of pages, anyway.

The Mork Borgians don’t get enough credit for their creativity. Generally each of the adventures has come cornerstone element that is quite interesting. The problem is that they don’t follow up. They have one idea and that’s it. Not so with this one. It delivers hit after hit, creative elements and interesting situations of diverse scope. For example, Stolen Wishes. A pile of coins under a sewer grate. Ye olde god of wishes is no more, but, if you seal a coin you’re cursed until YOU fulfill the wish. That’s fun! Good concept, nice push/pull. I’m down! And that’s just one of the ideas that this thing delivers. There are a lot, from individual room encounters to larger dungeon concepts and even treasure, that just reek of creativity. “A wooden idol bound with filthy bandages. Breaking it summons a small but vicious gore hound.” or “A darkened glass vial containing powdered sunlight. Worth a pretty penny to those who know its uses. Vampires and other undead monstrosities will give anything to see it destroyed.” Not just treasure, but a springboard to adventure also! Nicey done! How about a monster? “The finger collector

approaches in a mist of swirling spores. Visibly necrotic with tumorous growths on the shoulders and head, it clucks and clicks in a twisted mimicry of language. A necklace of fingers rattles around its neck.” Not bad! I could use a little more than “visibly necrotic”, but, still, not bad.

We get decent writing also. One sewer room has “Blood-red thorny roses sprout from the cracks between the stones.” Well, that’s a sight! A juxtaposition between a sewer environment and blood red roses, growing from cracks int he walls, should have the players shitting themselves! Formatting is pretty good to excellent. The pointcrawl sections, through the sewers, is randomized. I’m not a big fan of random for the sake of random, but, it works out ok this time. You rolls for a chamber and roll for people inside and it’s decent enough, with brief hits of evocative writing and good room formatting. Meaning a room title, a little brief overview, and then bolded bullet points with breif descriptions of DM text. The mechanics are nearby, but offset, so they don’t get in the way, and there are lots of minimaps. It’s done well. 

I would note, also, tat the Nork Borgians generally eschew a lot of up-front “how to use this adventure” bullshit boilerplate text. I’m supportive of this. I don’t need to be told how to read a stat block, nor does any other person, ever, in the history of D&D. Yes, I know I can customize the adventure, thank you, no need to tell me. And thank god they got rid of this shit. 

So, what could be improved?

There are, I think, two or three things that stand out.

First, the formatting fails in places because important things are not high enough up in the descriptions. A room with an alter in it, and little else, has no mention of it until pretty far down in the description. A room with a listing floor has no mention of it until farther in. Obvious things should be high up n the room description, generally in the player overview section, and not something for the DM to later discover as they scan the entry. “Oh, uh, yeah … and also the floor is listing a lot toward that door …” Well, fuck, Frank, you should have said so sooner! THis is a relatively common thing in this adventure. Thus the format is good but how to use the format to maximum effect falls down more than a little. 

There’s also, I think, A kind of lack of knowledge of how D&D works, or, perhaps, what the imrportant thing are. Hoks are presented as individual hooks. YOU owe someone. YOU escaped, and so on, almost like it was solo adventure. Rumors don’t always match up well to gameable content (although, “Gas from the sewers does funny things to the light, and what you see can’t be trusted.” is a great fucking rumor, for the obvios reasons!) One room has a ceiling that hides chitterring things … with no mention of creatures, so I assume they are just noises? There IS anunderstanding of some design elements … the troll king is foreshadowed rather well, for example, but there is also a kind of “individual rooms” theme rather than a “cohesive whole” theme. I’m not talking a funhouse set piece, or the need to themne every room, but a little more of a wholistic view of the adventure would have served the final eleven room dungeon well. And, man, loud rings bells are likely to be heard from more than one room away?

But, it’s not a bad adventure. It’s just not a ten. It’s creative, the writing is evocative which helps the DM run it, it’s formatted well, and it’s more than four rooms … it’s an actual adventure, which may be a first for a Mork Borg product? Good job. Good enough that, if I can remember, I’ll go looking for other Loot The Rooms to review.

This is $6 at DriveThru. The preview is nineteen pages, showing you both parts of the pointcrawl and the dungeon. Check it out! I like it!

https://www.drivethrurpg.com/product/363891/Treasures-Of-The-Troll-King

Posted in Dungeons & Dragons Adventure Review, Level 3, Reviews, The Best | 8 Comments

Tooth and Nail

By ELW Green
Lead Filled Games
OSE
Level 1?

Nerovia is a land existing in a world of nightmares. This ancient place struggles against spirits, disease, and the unknown. The people are busy surviving between lunar cycles and harvest season. The winters are long. The mountains are steep. Sorrow so clouds this land that the shadows lead the living. This adventure offers a rousing mystery in the forested mountain settlement of Brynmawr. Whether its’s the roaming hunger of the Hunter Beast, or a foul plot to murder an otherwise harmless baker, there is something afoot in Tooth and Nail.

This sixty page adventure details a small village and a few intrigues going on around it, in a sandboxy/open-ended manner. It’s got some good specificity in it and is not bad for what it’s trying to do, from a design standpoint. It’s also horribly overwritten with a formatting that is DISASTROUS for running the thing. Like, it’s a fucking novel instead of an adventure.

The concept here is pretty simple. You take a village, stuff some NPC’s in it, and then throw in four or five things going on that the party can get in to trouble with, with a few “adventure sites” supporting them. Where ‘adventure site’ is defined as a small lair dungeon with three rooms, repeat four or five times. There’s nothing wrong with that concept, it’s a time-honooured one. I think I prefer these things to support another, larger adventure. In other words you go to the dungeon and you use something like this as your home base, with the local trouble adding some intrigue during what would traditionally be downtime play. 

You start out in the inn, waking up in the common room the next morning after a night of drinking. Super! Nd the innkeeps wife is like “Wake up Jorge!” … except Jorge is dead, face down in his bowl of porridge. Supporting this are rumors of a ghost near the town well, and of a huge beast in the forest that villagers have seen. A couple of people are missing and the town is on edge with now what looks like the third murder in a short time. The local preist is working his dander up. Let’s toss in a handful of colorourful NPC, including an asshole sheriff, and you’re ready to go!

There’s some good specificity in the descriptions that bring the NPC’s to life, as well as the adventure sites. I think this is one of the harder aspects of writing an adventure, so I’m happy to see this in place. But the implementation here is ALL wrong.

We’re looking at 6o pages to get all of this out to the DM … and it slots in at 164 meg … meaning we’re getting image pages instead of text pages. And those NPC’s? They take SEVEN pages to describe, about two to a page. Listing just their name up top in bold, rather than their role also, making reference hard. They are relatively focused, and there is a summary at the rear, on one sheet … but the summary, in particular, is quite poor, not mentioning the essence of their nature or their quirks/knowledge well enough to run off of it. This is an issue. The village will live and die by it’s NPC’s, in terms of player engagement, and that just can’t be done with the way the information is presented.

And speaking of presentation …

This is a wall of text. I mean, literally, a wall of text. IDK what the format is called, but the right and left side of each paragraph are justified to a fixed length, resulting in an endless scroll of information, page upon page of text, presented as a wall. This fucking shit is IMPOSSIBLE to wade through. Some in long sections of italics, making it hard to read. Other just … a wall. 

Inside of this the actual specificity that bnrings the adventure to life, and the specificity DOES do that, is lost. In response to the death of the philandering baker, Milos, the villagers might say something like, “Yeah, Miklos can cook …” and so on. These little bits are GOLD, but are lost inside of theinpenetrablewall that the formatting brings to the table. 

Further, shit is scattered around. Info is on the rumors tables, in the various NPC descriptions in various site locations … putting it together in to one cohesive whole is going to be a pain. I had to read and reread in order to get certain pieces of information. One vital clue, the body of a boy, was lost to me unless I scanned the text for a third time. That won’t do AT ALL.

So, the basic concept is a good one. The actual DESIGN of the adventure is fine. But the formatting, and the wya the information is presented, is an absolute fucking disaster. Once you get past that you get a set of relativy mundane.common things goin on  the village for the party to resolve. Not 60 pages worth. Certainly not 164meg worth. And NOT worth slogging through in order to run it.

This is $10 at DriveThru. There is no preview, so fuck you if you wanted to take a gander before making a purchasing decision.

https://www.drivethrurpg.com/product/388626/Nerovia-III-Tooth-and-Nail?1892600

Posted in Reviews | 1 Comment