{"id":9010,"date":"2024-02-14T07:11:00","date_gmt":"2024-02-14T12:11:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/?p=9010"},"modified":"2024-01-31T08:54:05","modified_gmt":"2024-01-31T13:54:05","slug":"the-blue-lotus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/?p=9010","title":{"rendered":"The Blue Lotus"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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By Sylathar\nXal Sylath\nOSR\nLevel 2<\/pre>\n\n\n\n
If you\u2019re a novice GM: everything will be OK. Its all simple. You\u2019re not supposed to be Kurt Vonnegut , Hermann Melville or Stephen King. Its a social game and the players are responsible for their fun. \u201cWhat if everything goes wrong?\u201d Consider the movie \u201cthe big Lebowski\u201d\u2026every character in it, has a plan that fails eventually yet the ending is satisfactory to say the least.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This ten page adventure features five scenes, the last of which is a dungeon with ten rooms. It answers the age old question: what if a D&D adventure was written by a smug & condescending asshat. A collection of ideas, mostly, by someone who likes to hear themselves talk and thinks they are the cleverest person on earth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
People who use the phrase \u201cthe players are responsible for their own fun\u201d are usually asshats, in my experience. Sure, that\u2019s true, but, it\u2019s usually meant to justify something the speaker has done, or more frequently, not done. It\u2019s more that you don\u2019t have to spoon feed the players, not that you don\u2019t have to try. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
There is a page of this sage game advice right up front. And, the, after the first scene, which lasts half a page, there is ANOTHER half page of this asshattery. Condescending and patronizing. \u201cYour zen moment: the guys at lake Geneva and the Twin Cities, managed to create out of war games and \u2018make believe\u2019 – a form of game and quality more associated with Art. Its much more abstract than it appears to \u2026\u201d \u2026 sorry, threw up in my mouth a little. Hang on \u2026 speaking of game commentary \u201c… nitpicking on mechanical differences and taste is usually regarded as an attempt to educate other people about their logic. Don\u2019t go there often. It can be, at times, a subliminal cesspool of passionate chaos.\u201d And, yet, you just vomited up a page of this shit, kettle. Shall we continue? After the intro we get the following: \u201cWhat\u2019s written above is the framework. The cliche. The basic story told in kindergartens all across the world. Its something known and the Ether around it is the actual adventure. We might find out Aibon turned into a nazi\/cannibal or a unicorn dancing in the meadows – but the goal remains the same\u201d And I\u2019m supposed to take this seriously? There\u2019s a footnote on the page: \u201c*for those too young to know who the hell was Dennis Hopper – watch blue velvet\/apocalypse now or enjoy this link:[youtube link]\u201d Why, in the name of all that is unholy, would anyone every listen to anyone this condescending? I ask myself this, and, yet, there are fuckwits who think that Taylor Swift is some kind of pentagon agent. Anyway, dude who write this adventure is a condescending ass and the adventure is full of it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And, he likes the sound of his own voice and thinks he is the most clever person in the room \u201cHere be the gang of Vorjas the cruel (since he\u2019s a gnoll – no point calling him Vorjas the babyface is it?!)\u201d And we have to listen to these little quips spaced VERY frequently throughout the text. And this is what I\u2019ve selected as a hobby. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ok, so, five scenes, the last of which is a ten person dungeon. The scene framing is mostly garbage. Scene one is your hook and one of the scenes is the wilderness journey, so, more of a typical adventure structure but  with the added asshattery of calling them scenes.  Rich merchant dude has a sone. He\u2019s gone to look for the Blue Lotus, which can cure his wife’s illness. But, since then, his wife got better. He\u2019s portrayed as nouveau riche, and slightly racist. \u201cI\u2019m thrilled to know dwarves use forks \u2026\u201d It\u2019s not bad. It appears as a confused mass of text that has too many shit fucking quips and condescention in it, but also, not bad. Dude has his interview with you in the garden, cause he doesn\u2019t trust you in the house. If you bluff or sneak in to it then the following is provided as some ideas for the DM: 1: flirting with his daughter\/younger<\/p>\n\n\n\n
son\/trophy wife (they\u2019re all over 18 ok?!), 2: Finding a pentagram made of flour at the kitchen and a weird mute cook. 3: Get bitten by the pet greyhounds (1 HP damage).4: Offered to buy for a fraction of the actual price – some jewelry from a thieving servant. 5: Find Ariana smiling for nothing, all dosed on sedatives and a doctor explains she\u2019s hysteric<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Man, that\u2019s pretty good shit. In another scene, at a farmhouse, you meet the farmers kid, maybe. He\u2019s lost his mom a couple of years ago. He\u2019s made friends with a fey who visits at night. Kid in trouble for stealing milk and cookies. The party might overhear the kid and the fey: \u201cThe kid will pour his heart out to the fey (\u201cI miss mommy so much\u2026\u201d – \u201cshe\u2019s dead kiddo\u2026just remember her in your heart\u2026now the cookies\u201d)\u201d Both the compassion and the greed! Noice! And, then, if the party attacks the fey: \u201cThe kid will run to his rescue with a small switchblade and his father will stand by the kid of course\u201d A fucking switchblade! <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I note a couple of commonalities in these. First is the emphasis on situations. You\u2019ll note this in the merchants home, in particular. And, then, the reliability of the situations. The kids father, of course, siding with him. Even pulling a switchblade. Not a dagger. This is a place that has been imagined, without respect to the rules. And that\u2019s how to create an adventure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The forest part of the adventure has the advice \u201clet them wander around a bit,\u201d Which, as always, is terrible advice. Not for 5e or some such, but not in an OSR game. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The descriptions, when not referring to situations, are middling. Better than average but still not the quality I\u2019d like to see. From the final room in the dungeon: \u201cDescription: A rock filled cave. Dank and full of dirt. Suffocating aroma. Blue mushrooms give a pale light. All is miserably worthless\u2026yet there beneath the rocks stands the blue lotus\u2026Royale blue.\u201dDank, dark, dirt, suffocating. Not bad. Needs some polish but not bad. The encounters, though, are really just combats or empty rooms. The situations, so strong in the rest of the adventure, are no where to be seen here. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s all a muddled mess. Just a bunch of ideas thrown down on paper, for most of the adventure, without thought to formatting. No real structure. The ideas not expanded upon at all. Just a lot of \u201cwing it\u201d advice. Which, is great if you are a DM \u2026 but, we\u2019re not paying for a designer to tell us to wing it. We\u2019re paying for design. Without the pretentious condescension. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
This is Pay What You Want at DriveThru with a suggested price of $3.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
https:\/\/preview.drivethrurpg.com\/en\/product\/437041\/updated-the-blue-lotus-a-one-shot-adventure-for-the-novice-and-the-master?1892600<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n
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Bonus Review – Sisyphus Dice Game<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who doesn\u2019t love Sisyphus?! Since the death of God we\u2019ve only him and his eternal struggle to comfort us. Roll a die . 1-2 you go up the hill a little. 3-4 you stay in place. 5-6 you roll to the bottom again. We deserve better than this. But this i s all we\u2019ll get.  This kind of shit used to be on blogs and now it\u2019s for sale?!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
By Sylathar Xal Sylath OSR Level 2 If you\u2019re a novice GM: everything will be OK. Its all simple. You\u2019re not supposed to be Kurt Vonnegut , Hermann Melville or Stephen King. Its a social game and the players are … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9009,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9010","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dungeons-dragons-adventure-review","category-reviews"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/blue.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9010","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=9010"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9010\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9011,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9010\/revisions\/9011"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/9009"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=9010"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=9010"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=9010"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}