{"id":2888,"date":"2015-12-19T07:36:19","date_gmt":"2015-12-19T12:36:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/?p=2888"},"modified":"2015-12-14T12:37:23","modified_gmt":"2015-12-14T17:37:23","slug":"dungeon-magazine-69","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/?p=2888","title":{"rendered":"Dungeon Magazine #69"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"d69\"<\/a>
\nBlame Fallout. I wrote ahead but missed by schedule by 48 hours.<\/p>\n

Slave Vats of the Yuan-Ti
\nby Jason Kuhl
\nAD&D
\nLevels 3-5<\/p>\n

\u201cKeep a calculator at hand during this adventure, for the math.\u201d Oh, joy \u2026 DERP! This three-parter, with the first being in this issue, is a precursor to the adventure paths to come. This one if a decrepit mansion full of jerlamainee triggering traps on the party, and then some yuan-ti labs in the basement, in a house that causes magic to misfire and giant insects\/animals galore from a natural Enlarge effect. Parts of the house are nice (poison gas from an elephant trunk!) but the descriptions are mostly uninspired. The jerlamaine part feels like DM torture porn and the yuan-ti in the basement feels disconnected from the rest of the adventure.<\/p>\n

Challenge of Champions II
\nby Jonathan M. Richards
\nAD&D
\nAny level suckfest<\/p>\n

I like a bit more pretext. I shall quote the entirety of my review of the first installment, back in issue #58: This is a funhouse \u201cproving ground\u201d adventure. All spells are on scrolls and all weapons provided, no armor, blah blah blah, which is how it\u2019s an All Levels adventure. This is more X-Crawl then it is old school funhouse. 10 challenges, all of which are really puzzles of one sort of another. It\u2019s hard for me to recognize this as an adventure; it\u2019s more of an evening activity in my mind.<\/p>\n

Stumping the Party
\nby Christopher Pomeroy
\nAD&D
\nLevels 3-5<\/p>\n

Side-Trek. An ambush by an Ettercap and some spiders, with a couple of webbed chambers in a cave below. What\u2019s the fascination with Ettercaps? I don\u2019t get the love for them.<\/p>\n

Sleep of Ages
\nby Eric L. Boyd
\nAD&D
\nLevels 5-8<\/p>\n

This is it kids, the poster child for bad Dungeon adventures. If you want to know what the evil bad guy had for lunch on one random day thirty years earlier and the impact it had on their digestive system, then this is the adventure for you. I\u2019m sure that kind of detail is in this somewhere \u2026 because EVERYTHING else is also in here. Nine pages of text before the dungeon. Three pages of triple column text as background BEFORE the information for the dungeon master is presented. I\u2019m also happy to report that there is a great abundance of overly-long and complicated names of places and people \u2026 Oh Boy! \u201c[Long text describing something] \u2026 but all that remains of the massacre are a few small chunks of stone.\u201d Jesus H Fucking Christ. Really? Seriously? Lots of gimps here: lots of bodies, but speak with dead doesn\u2019t work and all of their valuables were hidden elsewhere, blah blah blah, experience the STORY and \u2026 [bleech]. Oops, sorry, threw up in my mouth and accidentally typed it out while doing so. But at least we have column long intricate room descriptions to look forward to \u2026 right? This goes in my Hall of Fame of bad adventures. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Blame Fallout. I wrote ahead but missed by schedule by 48 hours. Slave Vats of the Yuan-Ti by Jason Kuhl AD&D Levels 3-5 \u201cKeep a calculator at hand during this adventure, for the math.\u201d Oh, joy \u2026 DERP! This three-parter, … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2886,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,3,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2888","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dungeon-magazine","category-reviews","category-the-worst-evar"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/d69.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2888","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2888"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2888\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2889,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2888\/revisions\/2889"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2886"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2888"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2888"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tenfootpole.org\/ironspike\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2888"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}